it, intended
naturally for a secretary to an Autocratic Nobleman, who would trample
the rights of the people under foot. Here is another--"

"O pray, my dear, do not let us have another--"

"Only one more," said I; "here is another, thrust into the Cabinet for
being so disagreeable a fellow, who ought to have been engaged in making
fireworks for Crystal Palace fetes."

"But this is only an opinion of yours; how do you know these gentlemen
are not fitted for the posts they occupy? surely if they do the work--"

"The public would have no right to grumble."

"And as for obsequiousness and servility, I am afraid those are epithets
too often unjustly applied to those gentlemen whose courteous demeanour
wins them the respect of their superiors."

"Quite so," said I; "and I don't see that it matters what is the
distinguishing epithet you apply to them: this courteous demeanour or
obsequiousness is no doubt the very best gift Nature can bestow upon an
individual as an outfit for the voyage of life."

"Dear me, you were complaining but just now of its placing men in
positions for which they were not qualified."

"Not complaining, my love; only remarking. I go in for obsequiousness,
and trust I shall never be found wanting in that courteous demeanour
towards my superiors which shall lead to my future profit."

"But would you have men only courteous?"

"By no means, I would have them talented also."

"But in what proportion would you have the one to the other?"

"I would have the same proportion maintained that exists between the
rudder and the ship: you want just enough tact to steer your
obsequiousness."

Here again I dozed.

CHAPTER XVIII.

A comfortable evening at the Goose

When Mr. Bumpkin left the Mansion House, he was in a state of great
triumph not to say ecstasy: for it seemed to him that he had had
everything his own way. He was not cross-examined; no witnesses were
called, and it had only been stated by the prisoner himself, not proved,
although he said he should prove it at the trial, that the watch had been
in the family for upwards of forty years.

"The biggest lie," muttered Master Bumpkin, "that ever wur told." And
then he reasoned in this wise: "how could it a bin in his family forty
year when he, Bumpkin, only lost it the day afore in the most barefaced
manner? He was a pooty feller as couldn't tell a better story than
thic."

And then methought in my dream, "Ah, Bumpkin, tho