as soon as the wagon was driven to the door ready for the
parade, I would climb in and perform my part of the programme.

It was usually a query with hotel clerks and porters, who the auctioneer
could be and where he slept and took his meals.

My reason for thus disguising myself was to satisfy my employer, who
feared that the polish business would in some degree injure the auction
sales.

I made auctioneering my constant study, jotting down every saying that
suggested itself to me, and giving it a great deal of thought at odd
times. In the morning, at noon, and while walking from house to house I
conjured up all sorts of expressions.

Consequently I manufactured a large variety of comical descriptive talk
on all lines of goods we handled, besides an endless variety of funny
sayings and jokes with which to hold and entertain my audiences.

By reading a good deal and carefully listening to every thing that was
said in my presence I was constantly catching on to something new which
I combined with something original. I very soon found myself not only
rated equal to the average auctioneer, but almost invariably on my daily
trips selling polish I would be asked if I "had heard that auctioneer
the night before," and then would follow the highest commendation of his
ability.

This of course had a tendency to elevate me in my own estimation, and
was no doubt a motive power to urge me on to success. But under the
circumstances of not daring to make my identity known, I was unable to
share in the glory that my egotism would naturally crave for.

I became satisfied, at any rate, that I had "struck my gait," and at
once became wrapped up soul and body in the business.

In a few weeks my employer suggested that we let the musicians go, as he
was convinced that I was able to entertain my audiences sufficiently
without them. I agreed with him and we very soon learned that our sales
were better than with them.

The music seemed to divide the attention of the people, besides
suggesting more pleasure than business.

My commission was increased from five to seven per cent. as soon as
this fact was demonstrated.

Before quitting the business I was successful in acquiring a general
line of talk on suspenders, shoe-laces, combs, brushes, handkerchiefs,
hose, pocket-knives, razors, pencils, pins, stationery, towels,
table-cloths, and in fact everything belonging to this line of goods,
together with an endless variety of jokes an