Crispin and Moses in the bulrushes! May the divil fly
away wid me if I haven't found moy pants!"

"Good! Good! Where were they?"

"Howly Moses! come wid me to wan side. I'll tell yez on the quiet."

"Never mind about the quiet, Irish. Sing out; tell everybody."

"Oh, be jabers! ye'd laste expect to find thim where I seed thim."

"Well, tell us."

"Yes, tell us," said the Doctor.

"Well," he hesitatingly said, "be the howly shmoke, the ould chambermaid
has thim on, as sure as I'm a loive Irishman!"

"Oh, nonsense!" I replied. "You ought to be ashamed of yourself, to come
down here in the presence of these men and try to injure the character
of that poor chambermaid."

"By the great horned spoon! but she has the pants on, and Oi'll have
thim, charackther or no charackther, Misther Landlord!"

"Well, now, see here, Irish, I'll bet the cigars for the crowd, that she
hasn't got your pants on."

"All right, sir, all right, sir; I'll take that bet."

While we were shaking hands on the bet, the Doctor took a bundle from
under the counter containing the pants and ran up to the Irishman's
room, and hung them up.

We then went up-stairs, accompanied by several bystanders, and after
reaching the Irishman's room, I called to the chambermaid to come in.

Irish stood waiting for me to introduce the subject to the maid, and I
waited for him. I then turned to him and said:

"Well, Irish, prove your case."

"Well, be jabers! d'ye s'pose I am going to insult this lady? Not by a
dang sight, pants or no pants."

I turned to Dutchy and said:

"Have you got Irish's pants on?"

"Nix; I youst got my own pants."

"Well, come around here, Dutchy, and show Irish your pants."

Obeying my order, the dress was raised, exposing the pants to view.

Irish straightened himself up, and in a very triumphant manner, said:

"Well, there, Misther Landlord, I giss yez are quite well satisfied.
I'll take the cigars, and the pay for thim pants, if yez plaise."

I turned round and said:

"Whose pants are these hanging here, Irish? Did you have two pair
alike?"

He looked at them and said:

"Be gobs! she took thim off while me back was turned."

I then offered to bet him the cigars that she didn't.

He said he'd bet no more, but he knew there was some chicanery, or dom
hy-pocritical prognostication, somewhere.

I then asked the chambermaid to raise the dress again, which was done,
and Irish left the room disgusted, and mutter