ir, you know, that Dr. JOHNSON sat in, and the
inkpot, or whatever it was, that MARY, Queen of Scots, threw at JOHN
BUNYAN or somebody, and I have also seen garden-seats carved out of
famous battleships. And then again, if you go to Euston, or it may be
Darlington, you will find on the platform the original tea-kettle out
of which GEORGE WASHINGTON constructed the first steam-engine. The
drawing-room furniture that we are relinquishing combines the interest
of all these things. If I like I can put a placard on the sofa, before
I take its owner to see it, worded something like this:--

"Puffing Billy, the original steam-roller out of which this elegant
piece was carved, held the 1920 record for fourteen trips to Brighton
and back within half-an-hour." And after he has seen that I can lead
him gently on to Roaring Rupert, the arm-chair. Really, therefore,
when one comes to consider it, the man owes me a considerable sum of
money for the enhanced sentimental value that has been given to his
commonplace property.

Mind you, I have no wish to be too hard on him. I shall be content
with a quite moderate claim, or even with no claim at all. Possibly,
now I come to think of it; I shall simply say,

"You know what it is to have a couple of bally kids about the place.
What shall I give you to call it square?"

And he will name a sum and offer me a cigarette, and we shall talk a
little about putting or politics.

But it doesn't much matter. Whatever he asks he can only put it down
in the receipts' column of his account-book under the heading of
"Depreciation of Furniture," whereas in my expenses it will stand as
"Richard and Priscilla: for Adventures, Travel and Romance."

EVOE.

* * * * *

[Illustration: A ST. PATRICK'S DAY DREAM

(MARCH 17).

THE IDYLLIST OF DOWNING STREET (_with four-leaved shamrock_). "SHE
LOVES ME! SHE--BUT PERHAPS I'D BETTER NOT GO ANY FURTHER."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Visitor_. "AND HOW IS YOUR NEWLY-MARRIED DAUGHTER?"

_Mrs. Brown_. "OH, SHE'S NICELY THANK YOU. SHE FINDS HER HUSBAND A BIT
DULL; BUT AS I TELLS HER, THE GOOD 'UNS _ARE_ DULL."]

* * * * *

WINTER SPORT IN THE LOWER ALPS.

About two months ago, after a course of travel literature and some
back numbers of _The Badminton Magazine_, I became infected with a
desire to spend a winter in the Alps, skating, sliding, curling and
yodel