olicitor, my stockbroker, my land agent, my doctor, my
architect and my vicar (most of them hired for the occasion), I bought
fifty shares in the Jaguar mine of West Africa.

When I bought Jaguars they were at 1--1-1/16. This means that---- No, on
second thoughts I won't. There was a time when, in the pride of my new
knowledge, I should have insisted on explaining to you what it meant,
but I am getting _blase_ now; besides, you probably know. It is enough
that I bought them, and bought them on the distinct understanding from
my financial adviser that by the end of the month they would be up to 2.
In that case I should have made rather more than forty pounds in a few
days, simply by assembling together my solicitor, stockbroker,
land-agent, etc., etc., in London, and without going to West Africa at
all. A wonderful thought.

At the end of a month Jaguars were steady at 1-1/16; and I had received
a report from the mine to the effect that down below they were simply
hacking gold out as fast as they could hack, and up at the top were very
busy rinsing and washing and sponging and drying it. The next month the
situation was the same: Jaguars in London very steady at 1-1/16, Jaguar
diggers in West Africa very steady at gold-digging. And at the end of
the third month I realized not only that I was not going to have any
thrills at all, but (even worse) that I was not going to make any money
at all. I had been deceived.

. . . . .

That was where, eighteen months ago, I left the story of my City life. A
good deal has happened since then; as a result of which I am once more
eagerly watching the price of Jaguars.

A month or two after I had written about them, Jaguars began to go down.
They did it (as they have done everything since I have known them)
stupidly. If they had dropped in a single night to 3/4, I should at
least have had my thrill. I should have suffered in a single night the
loss of some pounds, and I could have borne it dramatically; either with
the sternness of the silent Saxon, or else with the volubility of the
volatile--I can't think of anybody beginning with a "V." But, alas!
Jaguars never dropped at all. They subsided. They subsided slowly back
to 1--so slowly that you could hardly observe them going. A week later
they were 63/64, which, of course, is practically the same as 1. A month
afterwards they were 31/32, and it is a debatable point whether that is
less or more than 6