That celery is good for the nerves.

Sec.129

That the jokes in _Punch_ are never funny.

Sec.130

That the Mohammedans are heathens.

Sec.131

That a sudden shock may cause the hair to turn grey over night.

Sec.132

That the farmer is an honest man, and greatly imposed upon.

Sec.133

That all the antique furniture sold in America is made in Grand Rapids,
Mich., and that the holes testifying to its age are made either with
gimlets or by trained worms.

Sec.134

That if a dog is fond of a man it is an infallible sign that the man is
a good sort, and one to be trusted.

Sec.135

That blondes are flightier than brunettes.

Sec.136

That a nurse, however ugly, always looks beautiful to the sick man.

Sec.137

That book-keepers are always round-shouldered.

Sec.138

That if one touches a hop-toad, one will get warts.

Sec.139

That a collar-button that drops to the floor when one is dressing
invariably rolls into an obscure and inaccessible spot and eludes the
explorations of its owner.

Sec.140

That an American ambassador has the French, German, Italian, Spanish,
Portuguese, Russian and Japanese languages at his finger tips, and is
chummy with royalty.

Sec.141

That the ready-made mail order blue serge suits for men are put together
with mucilage, and turn green after they have been in the sunlight for a
day or two.

Sec.142

That if one has only three matches left, the first two will invariably
go out, but that the third and last will remain lighted.

Sec.143

That all Chinamen smoke opium.

Sec.144

That every country girl who falls has been seduced by a man from the
city.

Sec.145

That an intelligent prize-fighter always triumphs over an ignorant
prize-fighter, however superior the latter in agility and strength.

Sec.146

That a doctor's family never gets sick.

Sec.147

That nature designed a horse's tail primarily as a flicker-off of flies.

Sec.148

That nicotine keeps the teeth in a sound condition.

Sec.149

That when an Odd Fellow dies he is always given a magnificent funeral by
his lodge, including a band and a parade.

Sec.150

That the man who is elected president of the Senior Class in a college
is always the most popular man in his class.

Sec.151

That a minor actress in a theatrical company always considers the
leading man a superb creature, and loves him at a distance.

Sec.152