The Americans are sadly behind the age. Sent home to one of my
Magazines, "How to see the World's Fair at Chicago in Twenty Minutes, by
One who has done it."

_July._--Session nearly out. Took part in a debate or two and then off
to the North Pole in a balloon. Managed to see a good deal of snow and
ice, and fancy we caught a sight of the Pole itself. Sent home (by
parachute) to one of my Magazines, "How I got within Measurable Distance
of the Moon."

_August._--Just back to Westminster for a couple of days to wind up the
Session, then away to India. Went on my own responsibility to see the
Ameer of AFGHANISTAN. Drew up a treaty in draft to be signed by the
Ameer and the Emperor of RUSSIA, CZAR was immensely pleased and wanted
to make me Prince of CRIM TARTARY. Sent to one of my Magazines. "How I
shot my first Wild Elephant."

_September._--Returned to Hawarden for the inside of a week and then
paid my hurried visit to Australia. Submitted to the Colonies a scheme
for "A Federal Association for the encouragement of the Naturalisation
of the Rabbit in Australasia." The proposal fell rather flat. Find the
rabbit is already known in these places. Sent home to one of my
Magazines an article entitled, "My Prize-fight with the Kangaroo, and
how I won it."

_October._--In London for a few days, then to Mexico. Saw the President,
and suggested the revival of the Empire. President very rude; told me to
mind my own business. Sent home to one of my Magazines, "A Week on the
Prairies Buffalo lassooing."

_November._--Popped in at Midlothian, and made a speech or two, and then
hurried away to Norway and Sweden. Tried to induce them to give up
_their_ form of Home Rule, which, as all the world knows, has been a
failure. Wanted them to take our Irish edition. They asked me "if it had
been a success?" Stumped! Sent to one of my Magazines, "How to take a
Photograph by Midnight Sunlight, by One who has done it."

_December._--Obliged to stay at home, because I think we are going to
change our Town-house. Downing Street most convenient, but question
whether I shall be able to get a renewal of the lease next year.
Sketched out the _scenario_ of the Drury Lane Pantomime; but Sir
AUGUSTUS prefers his own. Well, well, youth will have its way. Sent in
my special article for Christmas and the New Year, "The History of the
World, from the Earliest Times to the close of the Nineteenth Century,
by One who has employed his leisure moments i