ameful thing to _dock_ us as they
does. If the marrow in one's backbone should melt, it would be sartin to
run out at the tip of one's tail. I say, how's your _feed?_

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--Very indifferent--the chaff predominates--(_munch_)
not _bene_ by any means.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE.--Beany! Lord bless your ignorance! I should be satisfied
if they'd only make it _oaty_ now and then. How long have you been in
the hackney line?

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--I have occupied my present degraded position about two
years. Little thought my poor mama, when I was foaled, that I should ever
come to this.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE.--Ah! it ain't very respectable, is it?--especially since
the cabs and busses have druv over our heads. What was you put to?--you
look as if you had been well brought up.

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--My mama was own sister to _Lottery_, but
unfortunately married a horse much below her in pedigree. I was the
produce of that union. At five years old I entered the army under Ensign
Dashard.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE--Bless me, how odd! I was bought at Horncastle, to serve
in the dragoons; but the wetternary man found out I'd a splint, and
wouldn't have me! I say, ain't that stout woman with a fat family looking
at us?

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--I'm afraid she is. People of her grade in society are
always partial to a dilatory shillingworth.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE--Ay, and always lives up Snow-hill, or Ludgate-hill, or
Mutton-hill, or a _hill_ somewhere.

WOMAN.--Coach!

NEAR-SIDE HORSE.--She's ahailing us! I wonder whether she's narvous? I'll
let out with my hind leg a bit--(_kick_)--O Lord! the rheumatiz!

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--Pray don't. I abjure subterfuges; they are unworthy of a
thoroughbred.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE.--Thoroughbred? I like that! Haven't you just acknowledged
that you were a cocktail? Thank God! she's moving on. Hallo! there's old
Readypenny!--a willanous Tory.

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--I beg to remark that my principles are Conservative.

NEAR-SIDE HORSE.--And I beg to remark that mine isn't. I sarved Readypenny
out at Westminster 'lection the other day. He got into our coach to go to
the poll, and I wouldn't draw an inch. I warn't agoing to take up a
plumper for Rous.

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--I declare the obese female returns.

WOMAN.--Coach! Hallo! Coach!

WATERMAN.--Here you is, ma'am. Kuck! kuck! kuck!--Come along!--(_Pulling
the coach and horses_).

OFF-SIDE HORSE.--O heavens! I am too stiff to move, and this brute will
pull my head off.