anged bonfires in geometrical order, so far as we can understand
it, as a signal (if it is one); they seem to wish to observe something
like "_Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay_." Interesting. Popular song of fourteen
years ago just reached our nearest neighbour in the Solar System.
Cannot observe more, as the planet is off for another seven years.

_August_ 10, 1920.--We ought to do something this time. Improved
telescope; can see everything. So excellent that we can almost hear
the Marsians talking, Great advance, too, in through-space-hurling
machinery. We applied this new power to a pea-shooter, and, at the
first shot, was sufficiently fortunate to hit a Marsian policeman on
the nose. He first arrested an innocent person for the assault, but,
on our repeating the signal, he looked up, and shook his fist at the
Earth. Eventually he traced the source of the pea-shooting. They then
began to watch our signals. They were just about to reply when we
started off for another seven years.

_August_ 10, 1927.--I take up my predecessor's book to continue these
observations. Deeply interested to see if the inhabitants of the
neighbouring planet would remember the date, and be on the look out
for us. Yes, there they were. We have just signalled "How are you?"
But it has received, as yet, no reply. The Marsians seem to be
signalling, but not in our direction. We have just tried another
message, "Good morning; do you use soap?" Ah, this has woke them up!
They _do_ understand us. They have replied, "Don't be rude." We are
greatly encouraged by this, and have signalled "The planet Mars, we
believe?" This has elicited no response. Strange! We have begged for a
reply, and it has just come. Here it is:--"Don't bother; can't attend
to you just now. We are talking with the planet Jupiter." Time up! Off
for another seven years!

_August_ 10, 1934.--Just one line to add to the other communications
of my predecessors. The Earth and Mars Intercommunication Company,
Limited, has been merged into the London, Jupiter, Venus, Mars, and
North Saturn Aerial Railway Company. During the present near approach
of Mars to the Earth, an excursion electric air-torpedo train will
leave the Victoria Station for Pars the Capital of Mars. The excursion
will be personally conducted by Baron COOK of Ludgate Circus. Return
tickets, Second Class, L1,000; First Class (with hotel coupons), Half
an ounce of coal.

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[Illustration: "W