hy, into the street. But there also nothing
allays or diverts my longing. I return home to... long again
indescribably... I have not yet rehearsed my Concerto; in any
case I shall leave all my treasures behind me by Michaelmas.
In Vienna I shall be condemned to sigh and groan! This is the
consequence of having no longer a free heart! You who know
this indescribable power so well, explain to me the strange
feeling which makes men always expect from the following day
something better than the preceding day has bestowed upon
them? "Do not be so foolish!" That is all the answer I can
give myself; if you know a better, tell me, pray, pray....

After saying that his plan for the winter is to stay two months in
Vienna and pass the rest of the season in Milan, "if it cannot be
helped," he makes some remarks of no particular interest, and then comes
back to the old and ever new subject, the cud that humanity has been
chewing from the time of Adam and Eve, and will have to chew till the
extinction of the race, whether pessimism or optimism be the favoured
philosophy.

Since my return I have not yet visited her, and must tell you
openly that I often attribute the cause of my distress to
her; it seems to me as if people shared this view, and that
affords me a certain satisfaction. My father smiles at it;
but if he knew all, he would perhaps weep. Indeed, I am
seemingly quite contented, whilst my heart....

This is one of the occasions, which occur so frequently in Chopin's
letters, where he breaks suddenly off in the course of his emotional
outpourings, and subsides into effective silence. On such occasions one
would like to see him go to the piano and hear him finish the sentence
there. "All I can write to you now is indeed stupid stuff; only the
thought of leaving Warsaw..." Another musical opportunity! Where words
fail, there music begins.

Only wait, the day will come when you will not fare any
better. Man is not always happy; sometimes only a few moments
of happiness are granted to him in this life; therefore why
should we shun this rapture which cannot last long?

After this the darkness of sadness shades gradually into brighter
hues:--

As on the one hand I consider intercourse with the outer
world a sacred duty, so, on the other hand, I regard it as a
devilish invention, and it would be better if men... but I
have said enough!...

The reader