f to the right sauce, darts a
look of contemptuous triumph upon Sir Antinous Antibes, and, while she
is dipping her sole into the sauce, her soul expands with gratitude and
love.

_A_. I see, I see. Many thanks; my heroine is now a fair counterpart
of my hero.

"Ah, sure a pair were never seen,
So justly form'd to meet by nature."

_B_. And now I'll give you another hint, since you appear grateful. It
is a species of clap-trap in a novel, which always takes--to wit, a rich
old uncle or misanthrope, who, at the very time that he is bitterly
offended and disgusted with the hero, who is in awkward circumstances,
pulls out a pocketbook and counts down, say fifteen or twenty thousand
pounds in bank notes, to relieve him from his difficulties. An old coat
and monosyllables will increase the interest.

_A_. True. (_sighing_.) Alas! there are no such uncles in real life;
I wish there were.

_B_. I beg your pardon; I know no time in which _my uncle_ forks out
more bank notes than at present.

_A_. Yes, but it is for value, or more than value, received.

_B_. That I grant; but I am afraid it is the only "uncle" left now;
except in a fashionable novel. But you comprehend the value of this new
auxiliary.

_A_. Nothing can be better. Barnstaple, you are really --, but I say
no more. If a truly great man cannot be flattered with delicacy, it
must not be attempted at all; silence then becomes the best tribute.
Your advice proves you to be truly great. I am silent, therefore you
understand the full force of the oratory of my thanks.

_B (bowing_.) Well, Ansard, you have found out the cheapest way of
paying off your bills of gratitude I ever heard of. "Poor, even in
thanks," was well said by Shakespeare; but you, it appears, are rich, in
having nothing at all wherewith to pay. If you could transfer the same
doctrine to your tradesmen, you need not write novels.

_A_. Alas! my dear fellow, mine is not yet written. There is one
important feature, nay, the most important feature of all--the style of
language, the diction--on that, Barnstaple, you have not yet
doctrinated.

_B (pompously_.) When Demosthenes was asked what were the principal
attributes of eloquence, he answered, that the first was action; on
being asked which was the second, he replied, action; and the third,
action; and such is the idea of the Irish _mimbers_ in the House of
Commons. Now there are three important requisites in the d