BOIS DORMANT._
_'Twas five o'clock, the hour of tea;
But, having smoked, they're as you see_.]
* * * * *
TIPS FROM THE TAPE.
(_Picked up in Mr. Punch's Own Special City Corner._)
EVER since it became known that, in conformity with the general interest
in the condition of the Stock and Share Market, now manifested by all
classes of readers, you had determined to start your own special
"Corner," for the purpose of keeping your eye on the matter, and had
appointed me as your "City Commissioner," if I have been flooded with
applications from Stock-jobbers, tendering their advice, I may say I
have been literally overwhelmed by applications from clients and
outsiders, asking me for mine. With five tapes always on the move,
telephonic communication with everywhere, and my telegraphic address of
"Panjimcracks," comfortably installed in a third-floor flat in
commanding premises, within a stone's throw of the Stock Exchange, I
flatter myself that, at least in all the surroundings of my position, I
am, acting under your instructions, well up to the mark.
You would wish naturally to know something of the state of the market,
and would doubtless like to hear from me, if there is any particular
investment that I can recommend as safe for a rise. I have been giving
some attention lately to
PATAGONIAN CROCODILES,
but from news that has reached me from a private and most reliable
source (I hear that the Chairman and Directors, who have gone off with
the balance-sheet have disappeared, and have not been heard of for
months) I should strongly advise, if you hold any of it, to get rid of
it, if you can, as soon as possible. I have a similar tale to tell about
HERNEBAY Z'S.
This Stock has been run up by purchasers for the fall; and, though in
October last it somehow touched 117-3/8, it is now standing at 9-1/4,
and, spite the rumours of increased traffic receipts (due to the fact
that a family drove up to the station last week in a cab), artfully put
into circulation by interested holders, I would certainly get out of it
before the issue of the forthcoming Report, which I hear, on good
authority, not only announces the payment of no dividend on the
Debenture Stock, but makes the unwelcome statement to the shareholders
of the prospective seizure of the whole of the rolling stock under a
debtors' summons, a catastrophe that must land the affairs of the
Company in inevitable ban
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