Y BROTHER-IN-LAW LOSES HIS WHOLE BLINKING DRIFTER AND YOU DON'T
FINE 'IM A BLOOMING CENT."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Tommy._ "'E'S A WONDER AN' NO MISTAKE. I CAN'T TEACH
MY OLD DAWG AT HOME TO DO ANYTHINK."

_Pal._ "AH, BUT YER SEE, MATEY, YOU 'AVE TO KNOW MORE 'N A DAWG, OR
YER CAN'T LEARN 'IM NUTHIN."]

* * * * *

A SIGN OF THE TIMES.

"YOUNG LADY Wants post as Housekeeper to working man."--_Halifax
Evening Courier_.

* * * * *

"Planers (large letters) Wanted, for machine tool work; good
bonus; war work; permanent job."--_Daily Dispatch_.

Pessimist!

* * * * *

"WHAT DISABLED SOLDIERS SHOULD KNOW.

"That there is no such word as 'imossible' in his
dictionary."--_Canadian Paper_.

Correct.

* * * * *

"M. Polychromads, Green Charge d'Affaires, has left London for
the Hague."--_Sunday Times_.

It is an unfortunate colour, but with a name like that he can always
try one of the others.

* * * * *

"The canker of indiscipline and the wine of liberty have
shaken the Russian Army to its foundations."--_"Times" Russian
Correspondent_.

While the tide of new life that was kindled by the torch of revolution
seems destined to crumble into dust.

* * * * *

THE TRIUMPHAL PROGRESS.

There are few phases of the War--subsidiary phases, side-issues,
marginalia--more interesting, I think, than the return of the natives:
the triumphant progress, through their old haunts and among their old
friends, of the youths, recently civilians, but now tried and tested
warriors; lately so urban and hesitating and immature, but now so
seasoned and confident and of the world. And particularly I have
in mind the return of the soldier to his house of business, and
his triumphant progress through the various departments, gathering
admiration and homage and even wonder. I am not sure that wonder does
not come first, so striking can the metamorphosis be.

When he left he was often only a boy. Very likely rather a young
terror in his way: shy before elders, but a desperate wag with his
contemporaries. He had a habit of whistling during office hours; he
took too long for dinner, and was much given to descending the stairs
four at a time and shaking the premises,