Such a course would do their own country good, and, if
successful, would be most grateful to the rest of the world.

* * * * *

A Twist of the Cable.

Telegrams per cable state that "VON DER TANN is retreating"--also that
"a Prussian bark has been blown up."

Combining these two statements, we obtain an excellent quality of Tan
Bark, which may or may not be suggestive of further "Hidings" of the
Prussians by the French.

* * * * *

Grant-ed.

Recent disclosures concerning the President's Cabinet would go to show
that this piece of administrative furniture is a cabinet with Drawers.

* * * * *

Bad for their Health.

Travel is so impeded by the terrible state of affairs at present
existing in France, that the Prussians cannot take Tours.

* * * * *

New Occupation for the President.

A display heading in the _World_ of November 18th has the following
astounding line:--

"GRANT cuts SCHURZ."

* * * * *

[Illustration: NONE THE BETTER FOR TOO MUCH NURSING.

_Dr. W.G. Bryant._--"MR. KELLEY, THAT POOR CHILD PENNSYLVANIA HAS BEEN
FED TOO EXCLUSIVELY WITH PIG-IRON PAP. SUPPOSE YOU TRY SOME OF MY
FREE-TRADE MIXTURE, AND SEE IF THAT WON'T RESTORE IT TO HEALTH."]

* * * * *

HIRAM GREEN SURPRISED.

His Fellow-Citizens Present Him with a Silver Tea Service.

When the Hon. BILL SOOWARD allers gets home from a voyige, the sitezens
of Auburn give him a warm recepshen.

When Goyenor HOFFMAN visits the home of his childhood days, a
spontaneous bust of friendship throws her lovin embrace about him.

When a few sundry other peeple, whose names shall be nameless in this
communication, have arroven to their long home on tother side of the
River Sticks, they will get a recepshen so warm, that, settin on top a
red hot koal stove and sokin their feet in a kittle full of b'iling
water, will be full as cheerin to 'em as a Mint Jewlip is to an
inhabitant of the Equinoxial line.

Recepshens and presentashens bein the order of the day, I took it into
my head, a short time since, to have my feller sitizens of Skeansboro'
give me some of it.

Consekently I hired 1/2 dozen of my nabors, whom I supposed wouldent
make turnal fools of their selves, to call at the Old Green manshon with
a crowd of peeple, at the hour when I was supposed to