give an exhibition of roasting and eating a
human being, and to offer a reward for anybody that would consent to be
roasted and eaten in public.

Pa has gone to New York to look for somebody who will take the position
of meat for the cannibals, and he is instructed to spare no expense to
find such a man. He thinks he may find somebody connected with the Life
Insurance scandal, who has lost all desire to live any longer, and who
will gladly go into this "mutual" scheme. I don't know.

This circus business is too much for me, 'cause I am losing friends all
the time. Even the monkeys have got so they seem to be ashamed to be
seen talking to me, and when I pass the monkey cage they turn their
backs on me, as though I did not belong to their set. When a fellow gets
so low that monkeys feel above him, and throw out sarcastic remarks when
he goes by, it is time to change your luck some way.

CHAPTER XIV.

A Newport Monk Is Added to the Show--The Boy Teaches Him Some "Manly
Tricks"--The Tent Blows Down and a Panic Follows--Pa Manages the
Animal Act Which Ends in a Novel Manner.

We have added to the show the most remarkable animal that ever was--a
baboon that dresses like a man, and eats at a table, using a knife and
fork, and a napkin. This baboon has been playing an engagement with the
Four Hundred at Newport, dining with the crowned heads at that resort,
but the confounded baboon got to be too human, and he fell in love with
an heiress, and scared one of the Willie boys that was also in love with
her. His friends were afraid that the baboon would cut Willie out
entirely, or get jealous and injure Willie, so the manager of the Four
Hundred show decided to banish the baboon, and our show sent pa to
Newport to buy the baboon and bring him to our show at New York.

We had the darndest time getting him away from Newport. Pa couldn't do
any with him, but he took to me, 'cause he thought I was his long-lost
brother, and I could do anything with him. We got him in our stateroom
on the boat, and took his clothes away from him, 'cause he only wears
his clothes when he is being dined and wined, and we chained him in the
upper berth. He just raised the very deuce on the way down to New York.
After pa and I got to sleep that baboon got my clothes, and put them on,
slipped the chain over his head, jumped through the transom, and went
into every berth where the transom was open, and chatted with the people
who occ