Dicaeopolis, do you want to buy
some nice little porkers?

DICAEOPOLIS
Who are you? a Megarian?

MEGARIAN
I have come to your market.

DICAEOPOLIS
Well, how are things at Megara?(1)

f(1) Megara was allied to Sparta and suffered during the war more than
any other city because of its proximity to Athens.

MEGARIAN
We are crying with hunger at our firesides.

DICAEOPOLIS
The fireside is jolly enough with a piper. But what else is
doing at Megara, eh?

MEGARIAN
What else? When I left for the market, the authorities were taking
steps to let us die in the quickest manner.

DICAEOPOLIS
That is the best way to get you out of all your troubles.

MEGARIAN
True.

DICAEOPOLIS
What other news of Megara? What is wheat selling at?

MEGARIAN
With us it is valued as highly as the very gods in heaven!

DICAEOPOLIS
Is it salt that you are bringing?

MEGARIAN
Are you not holding back the salt?

DICAEOPOLIS
'Tis garlic then?

MEGARIAN
What! garlic! do you not at every raid grub up the ground with your
pikes to pull out every single head?

DICAEOPOLIS
What DO you bring then?

MEGARIAN
Little sows, like those they immolate at the Mysteries.

DICAEOPOLIS
Ah! very well, show me them.

MEGARIAN
They are very fine; feel their weight. See! how fat and fine.

DICAEOPOLIS
But what is this?

MEGARIAN
A SOW, for a certainty.(1)

f(1) Throughout this whole scene there is an obscene play upon (a) word
which means in Greek both 'sow' and 'a woman's organs of generation.'

DICAEOPOLIS
You say a sow! Of what country, then?

MEGARIAN
From Megara. What! is it not a sow then?

DICAEOPOLIS
No, I don't believe it is.

MEGARIAN
This is too much! what an incredulous man! He says 'tis not a sow;
but we will stake, an you will, a measure of salt ground up with
thyme, that in good Greek this is called a sow and nothing else.

DICAEOPOLIS
But a sow of the human kind.

MEGARIAN
Without question, by Diocles! of my own breed! Well! What think
you? will you hear them squeal?

DICAEOPOLIS
Well, yes, I' faith, I will.

MEGARIAN
Cry quickly, wee sowlet; squeak up, hussy, or by Hermes! I take you
back to the house.

GIRL
Wee-wee, wee-wee!

MEGARIAN
Is that a little sow, or not?

DICAEOPOLIS
Yes, it seems so; but let it grow up, and it will be a fine fat bitch.

MEGARIAN
In five years it will be just like its mothe