POOR WIVES

The domestic tyrant has redeeming features. As a rule he does not beat
his wife.

He feeds her well, clothes her decently, and is faithful to her. When
she is ill he sends for the doctor, and does not grumble unless her
convalescence should last too long. He does not want her to die, because
she consents to be his housekeeper without wages and allows him to get
out of her all the work that can possibly be extracted from one being
who does not claim the protection of the 'eight-hour' law.

He has enough self-control to resist the temptation of insulting her. He
treats her coolly, patronizingly, and keeps her at a respectful
distance, lest she should take liberties with him.

He is dull, solemn, conceited and selfish. When he joins the family
circle, wife and children have to be busy and silent, the only noise
allowed being the rustling of the newspaper he reads. He takes the lamp,
the only one on the table, and places it just behind his shoulder, so as
to light his paper well. His wife--poor cat! who has to see in the
dark--goes on with her sewing as best she can. The children remain
motionless and speechless until it is time to go to bed. Then they
smile, say good-night, and run away like culprits.

When he goes out the children speak above a whisper, and the women of
the family breathe and express an opinion among themselves, an act of
audacity which they would never think of indulging in in his presence;
and life goes merrily until someone, with a face a yard long, rushes in
and announces 'Father is coming!' The domestic tyrant is invariably
called 'Father' by the wife as well as by the children, and the word is
spelt with a capital 'F,' and the 'a' is sounded as if there were a
dozen French circumflex accents on the top of it.

The domestic tyrant is neither a lazy man nor a drunkard, nor anything
that is bad. On the contrary, he is a moral man. As a rule he does not
even smoke, and that is what makes him so powerful against reproach.
What can you say to a man who is steady, sober, intelligent,
hard-working, stingy perhaps, but asks forgiveness for that on the plea
that he has a large family to secure the future of? Outside of his house
he has a very good reputation; he is invariably called a good husband
and a good father. He invariably speaks well of his wife. Before
strangers, before friends and relatives, in her very presence, he will
sing her praises and extol her virtues, and will constantl