gentleman begged me, as if of his own accord, to
examine his master's conduct, to ascertain if my suspicions were well
founded. I have replied to him that fear was an incurable disease, that
the Earl of Lennox would not be so agitated if his conscience reproached
him with nothing, and that if some hasty words had escaped me, they were
but just reprisals for the letter he had written me.
"None of the inhabitants visited me, which makes me think they are all
in his interests; besides, they speak of him very favourably, as well as
of his son. The king sent for Joachim yesterday, and asked him why I
did not lodge with him, adding that my presence would soon cure him, and
asked me also with what object I had come: if it were to be reconciled
with him; if you were here; if I had taken Paris and Gilbert as
secretaries, and if I were still resolved to dismiss Joseph? I do not
know who has given him such accurate information. There is nothing,
down to the marriage of Sebastian, with which he has not made himself
acquainted. I have asked him the meaning of one of his letters, in
which he complains of the cruelty of certain people. He replied that
he was--stricken, but that my presence caused him so much joy that he
thought he should die of it. He reproached me several times for being
dreamy; I left him to go to supper; he begged me to return: I went back.
Then he told me the story of his illness, and that he wished to make a
will leaving me everything, adding that I was a little the cause of his
trouble, and that he attributed it to my coldness. 'You ask me,' added
he, 'who are the people of whom I complain: it is of you, cruel one,
of you, whom I have never been able to appease by my tears and my
repentance. I know that I have offended you, but not on the matter that
you reproach me with: I have also offended some of your subjects, but
that you have forgiven me. I am young, and you say that I always relapse
into my faults; but cannot a young man like me, destitute of experience,
gain it also, break his promises, repent directly, and in time improve?
If you will forgive me yet once more, I will promise to offend you never
again. All the favour I ask of you is that we should live together
like husband and wife, to have but one bed and one board: if you are
inflexible, I shall never rise again from here. I entreat you, tell me
your decision: God alone knows what I suffer, and that because I occupy
myself with you only, because I l
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