We, who are conversant with all the mysteries of the _flats'_ side of the
_green_ curtain, beg to assure our readers, that the Punch scene hath
taken _wing_, and that the dressing-room of the above-named characters
will no longer be redolent of the fumes of compounded bowls. We may here
remark that, had our hint of last season been attended to, the Punch would
have still been continued:--Mr. Harley would not consent to have the flies
picked out of the sugar. Rumour is busy with the suggestion that for this
reason, and this only, Keeley seceded from the establishment.

[Illustration]

We think it exceedingly unwise in the management not to have secured the
services of Madame Corsiret for the millinery department. Mr. Wilson still
supplies the wigs. We have not as yet been able to ascertain to whom the
swords have been consigned. Mr. Emden's assistant superintends the
blue-fire and thunder, but it has not transpired who works the traps.

With such powerful auxiliaries, we can promise Mr. C. Mathews a prosperous
season.

* * * * *

THE AMENDE HONORABLE.

Quoth Will, "On that young servant-maid
My heart its life-string stakes."
"Quite safe!" cries Dick, "don't be afraid--
She pays for all she breaks."

* * * * *

PROVIDING FOR EVIL DAYS.

The _iniquities_ of the Tories having become proverbial, the House of
Lords, with that consideration for the welfare of the country, and care
for the morals of the people, which have ever characterised the compeers
of the Lord Coventry, have brought in a bill for the creation of _two_
_Vice_-Chancellors. Brougham foolishly proposed an amendment, considering
one to be sufficient, but found himself in a _singular_ minority when the
House

[Illustration: DIVIDED ON THE MOTION.]

* * * * *

In the Egyptian room of the British Museum is a statue of the deity IBIS,
between two mummies. This attracted the attention of Sibthorp, as he
lounged through the room the other day with a companion. "Why," said his
friend, "is that statue placed between the other two?" "To preserve it to
be sure," replied the keenly-witted Sib. "You know the old saying teaches
us, '_In medio tutissimus Ibis._'"

* * * * *

PUNCH'S THEATRE.

THE LIFE AND DEATH OF JAMES DAWSON.

[Illustration: M]Mercy on us, what a code of morality--what a
conglomeration of plot