Piano_). "LOOK HERE, ALGY. I DO CALL IT BEASTLY BAD
FORM FOR YOU AND SIKES TO TALK WHEN I'M SINGING!"

_Algy_. "ALL RIGHT, OLD MAN--AWFULLY SORRY--DIDN'T KNOW YOU _WERE_
SINGING, YOU KNOW!"]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

_House of Commons, Tuesday, June 23_, 12'15 A.M.--House just
adjourned; a little dazed by shock of narrow escape from grievous
danger. Been at it through greater part of night debating Second
Reading of Education Bill. JULIUS 'ANNIBAL PICTON led off with speech
of fiery eloquence. The SQUIRE of MALWOOD declares he never listens to
J.A.P. without an odd feeling that there have been misfits. Both his
voice and his gestures are, he says, too large for him. But that,
as ALGERNON BORTHWICK shrewdly points out, is professional jealousy
supervening on the arrogance of excessive stature. The SQUIRE, though
not lacking in moods of generosity, cannot abear a rival in the
oratorical field. Had things turned out differently to-night, he might
have enjoyed the advantage of addressing House at this favourable
hour, whilst its withers were yet unwrung.

[Illustration: Sir Algernon.]

But JULIUS 'ANNIBAL has not studied his great ancestor's strategy for
nothing. As soon as Second Reading of Education Bill appeared on the
paper, he romped in, and put down Amendment. Needn't move it; didn't
mean to move it; doesn't move it; but he gets first place in principal
Debate of Session, and shows himself worthy of it by the luminous
argument and almost passionate eloquence of his oration.

It wasn't that the House was disturbed about. The particular incident
arose a quarter of an hour before midnight, when CRANBORNE suddenly
got up and moved Adjournment of Debate. J.A. had bowled him and others
over in the earlier part of the Sitting; but there was a second night,
and the HOPE of HATFIELD determined he would collar that. Had the
Motion for Adjournment been accepted, he would, in accordance with
usage, have opened the ball when the House met again once more, fresh,
and in the mood to listen. But JOKIM objected to losing the quarter of
an hour.

"We can," he said, pleasantly, "bear another speech."

All right; CRANBORNE only a private Member, and modest withal; not the
person to argue with his pastors and masters. So resumed his seat. If
they wanted to use up the time, let some one else speak through the
quarter of an hour. Had things been s