story of German spy_).
"AND WHEN THE POLICE SEARCHED THE CELLARS THEY FOUND ENOUGH AMBITION TO
BLOW UP THE WHOLE OF LONDON."

* * * * *

"PROGRESL IN NORTHERN FRANCE."

_North Eastern Daily Gazette._

Przemysl, however, remains in Galicia.

* * * * *

STUDIES IN DISCIPLESHIP.

(_In humble imitation of the exploits of the German Wireless Service._)

Mr. RAMSAY MACDONALD and Mr. KEIR HARDIE have joined Mr. BLATCHFORD in a
recruiting campaign, with most gratifying results. In the course of one
of his speeches Mr. RAMSAY MACDONALD announced that the experience he
had gained while tiger-shooting in India had enabled him to organise an
elephant-gun battery, with which he was shortly about to proceed to the
front.

It is reported that, at the instigation of the Chevalier WILLIAM LE
QUEUX, the Republic of San Marino has declared war on Germany, and
appointed the Chevalier as _generalissimo_ of its forces, which are
estimated at 250 men.

Great consternation has been caused in Vienna on receipt of the news
that, in view of BEETHOVEN'S full name being VAN BEETHOVEN, and his
origin Dutch, he has been removed from the list of belligerent composers
and regarded as a neutral by concert-givers in London and Paris. A
counter-movement has in consequence been started with the object of
treating BEETHOVEN as a hostile alien during the progress of the war.

The transports of enthusiasm caused in Berlin by the announcement that
Mr. G. B. SHAW had decided to be known in future as Mr. BERNHARDI SHAW
have given place to bitter disappointment on the peremptory denial of
the rumour by the famous comedian himself. As a matter of fact he is
hesitating between Benckendorff, Balakirev and Bomboudia.

* * * * *

"War F. N. Belgian Manager going home, sold new F. N. Motorbike
2-1/2 H.P. kick starter at cost price."

_Advt. in "Ceylon Independent."_

The starter will probably consider that it is not worth it.

* * * * *

"A flag day on behalf of the Belgian refugees was held at Wimbledon
yesterday. A procession was formed in front of the Town Hall headed
by the High Sheriff of Paris, M. Leo Strachey."--_Sunday Chronicle._

We welcome M. STRACHEY to England, and trust that he will be impressed
by such British institutions (_e.g. The Spectator_) as he may chance to
come across during h