acquainted than I can possibly be. I recommend him, however,
to those civilities which every stranger, of whom one knows no harm,
has a right to; and I request you will do him all the favor that, on
further acquaintance, you shall find him to deserve. I have the
honor to be, etc.

EPITAPH FOR HIMSELF

THE BODY
OF
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
(LIKE THE COVER OF AN OLD BOOK,
ITS CONTENTS TORN OUT,
AND STRIPT OF ITS LETTERING AND GILDING),
LIES HERE FOOD FOR WORMS;
YET THE WORK ITSELF SHALL NOT BE LOST,
FOR IT WILL (AS HE BELIEVED) APPEAR ONCE MORE
IN A NEW
AND MORE BEAUTIFUL EDITION
CORRECTED AND AMENDED
BY
THE AUTHOR.

WHY HE LEFT

Mr. Dickson, a colored barber in a large New England town, was shaving
one of his customers, a respectable citizen, one morning, when a
conversation occurred between them respecting Mr. Dickson's former
connection with a colored church in that place:

"I believe you are connected with the church in Elm Street, are you not,
Mr. Dickson?" said the customer.

"No, sah, not at all."

"What! are you not a member of the African church?"

"Not dis year, sah."

"Why did you leave their communion, Mr. Dickson, if I may be permitted
to ask?"

"Well, I'll tell you, sah," said Mr. Dickson, stropping a concave razor
on the palm of his hand, "it was just like dis. I jined de church in
good fait'; I gave ten dollars toward the stated gospil de first year,
and de church people call me '_Brudder_ Dickson'; de second year my
business not so good, and I gib only _five_ dollars. That year the
people call me '_Mr._ Dickson.' Dis razor hurt you, sah?"

"No, the razor goes tolerably well."

"Well, sah, de third year I feel berry poor; had sickness in my family;
I didn't gib _noffin_' for preachin'. Well, sah, arter dat dey call me
'_dat old nigger Dickson_'--and I left 'em."

WILLIAM ALLEN BUTLER

NOTHING TO WEAR

Miss Flora M'Flimsey, of Madison Square,
Has made three separate journeys to Paris,
And her father assures me, each time she was there,
That she and her friend, Mrs. Harris
(Not the lady whose name is so famous in history,
But plain Mrs. H., without romance or mystery),
Spent six consecutive weeks, without stopping,
In one continuous round of shopping--
Shopping alone, and s