left nothing to be desired. The interloper, compactly
imbedded, immediately imparted such an atmosphere to his vicinity that
even the cook would have sworn he was baked in. I blush to say I was
Irving's guest on one such occasion."
"And Sir Roach paid for both dinners?"
"Bless you, yes. Sir Roach, F.R.S. (fried, roasted, or stewed). Indeed,
his hospitality did not end here. We were pressed to call again, and
begged not to mention the incident. Of course, this was in our more
prosperous days, before either of us had taken on the stamp of our
exclusiveness. Even Irving would hesitate to try it now, I fancy."
"Poor Irving! A good fellow, but morally insane. In Baton Rouge now, I
believe?"
"Yes. He changed overcoats with a gentleman.
"I wonder how the cooking is in that State institution, Humphrey? Irving
is such an epicure--"
"Oh, he's faring well enough, doubtless. Trust those Louisianians for
cookery. When Irving is in New Orleans there are special houses where
he drops in on Fridays, just for _court-bouillon_. I've known him to
weed a bed of geraniums rather than miss it."
"Such are the vicissitudes of pedestrianism. Well, _tempus fugit_; let
us be going. We have just an hour to reach our dining-hall. Here come
the crowd from church. The Christmas service is very beautiful. Do you
recall it, Humphrey?"
"Only in spots--like the varioloid."
They were quite in the crowd now, and so ceased speaking, and presently
the Colonel was considerably in advance of his companion. So it happened
that he did not see Humphrey stop a moment, put his foot on a bit of
green paper, drop his handkerchief, and in recovering it gather the
crumpled bill into it.
Thus it came about that when Sir Humphrey overtook his friend, and,
tapping him upon the shoulder, invited him to follow him into a famous
saloon, the Colonel raised his eyes in mild surprise.
Sir Humphrey paid for the drinks with a ten-dollar note, and then the
two proceeded to the side door of a well-known restaurant.
"Private dining-room, please," he said, and he dropped a quarter into
the hands of the servant at the door as he led the way.
* * * *
It was two hours later when, having cast up his account from the bill of
fare, Sir Humphrey, calling for cigars, said: "Help yourself, Colonel.
If my arithmetic is correct, we shall enjoy our smoke, have a half
dollar for the waiter, and enter the Square with a wh
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