es, an' I doubt ef I'd
have the cheek to do it in the face of sech a thing as that.

"Fact is, when I come into a room where one of 'em is, I sort o' look
for it to tilt over of its own accord an' bow to me an' ask me to 'be
seated.'

"You needn't to laugh. Of co'se, they's a reason for it--but it's so.
I'm jest that big of a ninny. Ricollec' Jedge Robinson, he used to have
one of 'em--jest about the size o' this one--two goblets an' a
bowl--an' when I'd go up to the house on a errand for pa, time pa was
distric' coroner, the jedge's mother-in-law, ol' Mis' Meredy, she'd be
settin' in the back room a-sewin,' an' when the black gal would let me
in the front door she'd sort o' whisper: 'Invite him to walk into the
parlor and be seated.' I'd overhear her say it, an' I'd turn into the
parlor, an' first thing I'd see'd be that ice-pitcher. I don't think
anybody can _set down_ good, noways, when they're ast to 'be seated,'
an' when, in addition to that, I'd meet the swingin' ice-pitcher half
way to the patent rocker, I didn't have no mo' consciousness where I
was a-settin' than nothin'. An' like ez not the rocker'd squawk first
strain I put on it. She wasn't no mo'n a sort o' swingin' ice-pitcher
herself, ol' Mis' Meredy wasn't--walkin' round the house weekdays
dressed in black silk, with a lace cap on her head, an' half insultin'
his company thet he'd knowed all his life. I did threaten once-t to
tell her, 'No, thank you, ma'am, I don't keer to be seated--but I'll
_set down_ ef it's agreeable,' but when the time would come I'd turn
round an' there'd be the ice-pitcher. An' after that I couldn't be
expected to do nothin' but back into the parlor over the Brussels
carpet an' chaw my hat-brim. But, of co'se, I was young then.

"Reckon you've heerd the tale they tell on Aleck Turnbull the day he
went there in the old lady's time. She had him ast into the cushioned
sanctuary--an' Aleck hadn't seen much them days--an' what did he do but
gawk around an' plump hisself down into that gilt-backed rocker with a
tune-playin' seat in it, an', of co'se, quick ez his weight struck it,
it started up a jig tune, an' they say Aleck shot out o' that door like
ez ef he'd been fired out of a cannon. An' he never did go back to say
what he come after. I doubt ef he ever knew.

"How much did you say for the ice-pitcher, Rowton? Thirty dollars--an'
you'll let me have it for--hush, now, don't say that. I don't see how
you could stand so close to