* * *

Illustration: FAIR LOOT.

_John Bull, A.B._ "WELL, I DIDN'T START OUT FOR THIS; BUT THERE CAN'T BE
ANY HARM IN PICKING UP A GOOD THING."

* * * * *

"The idea is to make it possible for every individual to register
for himself a number at the General Post Office.... All you do is to
address him, say: '105051, care General Post Office,' and the
officials look up 05051's latest address and forward the letter."

We fear that this is just what they would do.

* * * * *

"The members of Caldicot Wesleyan Church Sunday School had their
annual summer tea on Tuesday in a field kindly lent by Mr. W. Howard
of Church Farm."

This comes under the heading "War Items" in _The Newport Evening Post_.
On applying to the Official Press Bureau, however, we were unable to
obtain from Mr. F. E. SMITH any confirmation of the rumour.

* * * * *

"The Chairman put the vote, and there being no answering cries of
'!' declared the vote carried _nemine contradicente_."

_Birmingham Daily Post._

After which the proceedings closed amid approving shouts of
"[Illustration of pointing finger]."

* * * * *

"A large firm of contractors to hotels points out that a prominent
form of waste is eating too much."--_Times._

Conversely, eating too much brings on a prominent form of waist.

* * * * *

Motto for debtors: _Moratorium, te salutamus._

* * * * *

THE CALL OF ENGLAND.

[Every lover of England is bound to give what he can spare--and
something more--for the help of those who may suffer distress
through the War. Gifts to the National Relief Fund should be
addressed to H.R.H. The Prince of Wales, at Buckingham Palace.]

Come, all ye who love her well,
Ye whose hopes are one with hers,
One with hers the hearts that swell
When the pulse of memory stirs;
She from whom your life ye take
Claims you; how can you forget?
Come, your honour stands at stake!
_Pay your debt!_

By her sons that hold the deep,
Nerves at strain and sinews tense,
Sleepless-eyed that ye may sleep
Girdled in a fast defence;--
By her sons that face the fire
Where the battle-lines are set--