CENE--_A Landing Stage under Margate Pier. Excursionists
discovered embarking in two rival sailing-boats, the "Daisy"
and the "Buttercup," whose respective Mates are exchanging
repartees._

[Illustration: "Pirate,--that's what I _was_, Sir!"]

_Mate of the "Daisy"._ This gangway, Marm--(_to a Stout Lady_)--not
_that_ one, if you want to _enjoy_ yourself. That one'll take you
aboard the "_Buttercup_," Marm!

[_The Stout Lady patronises the "Daisy."_

_Mate of the "Buttercup."_ You may 'ave _that_ little lot! Don't you
go overloadin' that 'ere old tub o' yourn, that's all!

_M. of the D._ No fear o' _you_ bein' crowded, anyhow. Folks ha' got
more sense!

_M. of the B._ Why, we can outsail _you_ any day. Spoke you off the
Tongue light, we did, close in to ye, we were--and back ten minutes
_afore_ ye--come! The "Buttercup"'ll answer any way we put her--a'most
_speak_ to us, _she_ will!

_M. of the D._ Ah, it's lucky for you she can't _quite_ speak--you'd
'ear some plain langwidge if she did!

_M. of the B._ _Our_ boat ain't never mis-stayed with us, 't all
events; ye can't deny that!

_M. of the D._ We don't go out for sailing, _we_ don't--we go out
for _pleasure_! (_As the "Daisy," having received her complement of
passengers, puts off._) Tralla! we'll resoom this conversation later
on; you won't ha' got off afore we're back, _I_ dessay!

[_The_ Mate of the "Buttercup" _is reduced to profanity._

_ON BOARD THE "DAISY," DURING THE TRIP._

_The Stout Lady._ Very 'an'some they fit these yachts
up--garding-seats all across the deck, and all the cushings in red
plush. It do give you sech a sense of security!

_A Lugubrious Man._ Oh, we shall be all right, so long as this squall
that's coming up don't catch us before we're in again. Else we shall
take _our_ tea down at the bottom, along with the lobsters!

_A Chirpy Little Man with a red chin-tuft_ (_to a female
acquaintance_). Well, how are _you_ feelin', eh?

_The Acquaintance._ Oh, all right, thenks--so long as I keep still.
There's more waves than it looked from the Pier.

_The Chirpy Man._ Waves? These ain't on'y ripples. When we're off the
Foreland, now, you _may_ talk!

_The Acq._ If it's worse than it is now, I _shan't_.

_The Chirpy Man._ Why, you ain't afraid o' being queer already? I'm
reg'lar enjoyin' it, I am. You don't object to me samplin' a cigar?
You enjoy the flavour of a smoke more when you're on the water, yer
know.