wit and fancy fail,
To produce your twice-cooked kail
(As "a traveller") must be nice.
Nor are you confined to _twice_;
Hashed, rehashed, and hashed again,
Garnished--from another brain,
Seasoned--from another cruet,
You may roast, or boil, or stew it
O'er and o'er, year in year out,
As you perorate about,
Seek, when weary,--o'ertasked elves!
"Inspiration" from your shelves.
Salt it here, and sauce it there,
Saying nothing, since none care
To make question, taking pay,
Yes, and praise upon your way,
For--well, ere the thing is through,
What is what and who is who,
It might puzzle you to tell;
Still you "think it right"! Ah, well!
This philosophy peripatetic
Strikes a chord that's sympathetic
In the breast of secular scribe;
Nothing, it is true, would bribe
Him to play the pious prig,
But--he heaves a sigh that's big
Murmuring, enviously I fear,--
Oh, to be a Pulpiteer!

* * * * *

A CAUDAL LECTURE;

_OR, DARWINISM IN THE CRICKET FIELD._

When Man first arose from the primitive Ape,
He first dropped his tail, and took on a new shape.
But Cricketing Man, born to trundle and swipe,
Reversion displays to the earlier type;
For a cricketing team, when beginning to fail,
Always loses its "form," and "developes a tail"!

* * * * *

ROBERT ON THINGS IN GINERAL.

I was only jest a thinkin the other day, what werry distinguisht
honner Her Most Grashus Madgesty the QUEEN would bestow on the Rite
Honerabel the LORD MARE, when the rite time cum. But I was ardly
prepaird for the acshal fack!

I reelly coudn't have bleeved it if I hadn't a had it red out to me
from a most respecfool Mornin Paper; so in course it must be trew.
Yes, the Rite Honorabel the LORD MARE is not only to be a Nite, like
other Lord Mares, but the QUEEN has acshally made him a Nite Commander
of the most xtinguisht Order of Saint Mikel, and, not sattisfide with
ewen that, Her MADGESTY has also made him a Nite Commander of the
other most xtinguisht Order of Saint George!

It is fortnit that Sir DAVID's year of offis will soon end, or he mite
have fownd it diffikult to carry out his ushal LORD MARE's numerus
dootys, while Commanding two sitch xtinguisht Orders as them as is
named above.

My Amerricane Friend has turnd up agane at our bewtifool Grand Otel.
He says as they has had orful whether wear he has cum from,