ss, but poor _Mr. Horfay_ not
a daring for to look at her, becoz if he does before he gets her home,
she will be ded again direckly! Was there hever such a tanterlising
case ever known! When she sings to him to give her one loving look,
he sings to her to say he mustn't, until at larst she sets down on a
nice cumferel-looking sofy, as appens for to be in the werry middel of
the street, and says, werry artfully, as she carn't go not one step
farther, when in course he turns round, and rushes up to her to have
one fond embrace, and, thank goodness, they has it, and then she falls
back dead!

Well, now, I knos as I'm ony a mere Hed Waiter, and, therefore, not
xpected to have any werry fine feelings, like my betters has, but

I do declare that, when I saw this sad, sad end to all that grand
amount of reel true Love, the tears run down my cheeks like rain, and
I was a getting up to go away, when presently in came the lovly angel
again, whose name I was told was Love, and told him that such love
as his could conker Death itself; and she brort the pore wife to life
again, and all hended, as all things shood end, jovial, and cumferal,
and happy. What a wunderful thing is Music! It didn't seem at all
strange to me that not one single word was spoke all the heavening,
but ewery word sung, and in a forren tung, too, that I didn't
hunderstand, the bewtiful story kep my atention fixt the hole time,
and I warked home in the poring rain, werry thankful, and jest a
leetle prowd, that in one thing, at least, I was not xacly like BROWN,
who slept carm and content thro the hole of the larst hact.

ROBERT.

* * * * *

THE FATE OF SALVATION ARMY GENERALS.

"Each General is, by a deed of appointment, executed and
placed in safe custody with certain formalities, &c."--_Gen.
Booth's Letter to the Times, Nov._ 27.

This is dreadful! Why should the Generals be executed? What have they
done to deserve this cruel fate? And what is the use of placing them
in safe custody _after_ they have been executed? And what are the
"certain formalities"? We pause for a reply to all these questions.

* * * * *

SEASONABLE.--CHRISTMAS IS COMING.--In the _Morning Post_, one day last
week, appeared an announcement to the effect that Madame NOEL had
left one residence in the West End for another in the same quarter.
Odd this, just now. But go where she will, _Le bon pere_ NOEL will