andy soil, and some in deep clay. Hence their wines are bad.
For no culture or reward will make barren land bear good vines. Know
therefore, assuredly, that your prizes have increased the quantity of
bad but not of good wine."

There was a long silence. At length the king spoke. "Give him the purple
robe and the chain of gold. Throw the wines into the Euphrates; and
proclaim that the Royal Society of Wines is dissolved."

*****

SCENES FROM "ATHENIAN REVELS." (January 1824.)

A DRAMA.

I.

SCENE--A Street in Athens.

Enter CALLIDEMUS and SPEUSIPPUS;

CALLIDEMUS. So, you young reprobate! You must be a man of wit, forsooth,
and a man of quality! You must spend as if you were as rich as Nicias,
and prate as if you were as wise as Pericles! You must dangle after
sophists and pretty women! And I must pay for all! I must sup on thyme
and onions, while you are swallowing thrushes and hares! I must drink
water, that you may play the cottabus (This game consisted in projecting
wine out of cups; it was a diversion extremely fashionable at Athenian
entertainments.) with Chian wine! I must wander about as ragged as
Pauson (Pauson was an Athenian painter, whose name was synonymous with
beggary. See Aristophanes; Plutus, 602. From his poverty, I am inclined
to suppose that he painted historical pictures.), that you may be
as fine as Alcibiades! I must lie on bare boards, with a stone (See
Aristophanes; Plutus, 542.) for my pillow, and a rotten mat for my
coverlid, by the light of a wretched winking lamp, while you are
marching in state, with as many torches as one sees at the feast of
Ceres, to thunder with your hatchet (See Theocritus; Idyll ii. 128.)
at the doors of half the Ionian ladies in Peiraeus. (This was the most
disreputable part of Athens. See Aristophanes: Pax, 165.)

SPEUSIPPUS. Why, thou unreasonable old man! Thou most shameless of
fathers!--

CALLIDEMUS. Ungrateful wretch; dare you talk so? Are you not afraid of
the thunders of Jupiter?

SPEUSIPPUS. Jupiter thunder! nonsense! Anaxagoras says, that thunder is
only an explosion produced by--

CALLIDEMUS. He does! Would that it had fallen on his head for his pains!

SPEUSIPPUS. Nay: talk rationally.

CALLIDEMUS. Rationally! You audacious young sophist! I will talk
rationally. Do you know that I am your father? What quibble can you make
upon that?

SPEUSIPPUS. Do I know that you are my father? Let us take the question
to pieces, as Melesigenes wo