women who wanted to be
caught and didn't care a continental who caught them.
The atmosphere about such a place would be a blizzard of heat and cold,
filled with fine sand, and would make a person with a heart, who loved
children, think he or she was in hell looking for an artesian well.
A hotel proprietor who will thus insult the better part of the human
race, should be ignored entirely by all who love children, and he should
be compelled to stand on his deserted verandah all the season and see
his rival across the way, who entertains children, surrounded by
the richest and best guests, and the soulless creature, and the few
soulless, dyspeptic boarders that he has, should be obliged to listen
to the laughter of thousands of happy children running races and playing
tag up and down the lawn of the man who has a soul.
No one who would patronize a summer hotel that refuses little children
a breath of God's fresh air should enjoy a moment's pleasure. Mosquitoes
should bore them, and country dogs should bark all night and keep them
awake. Be they male or female resorters, we pray for ants to crawl up
them, for bugs and worms to go down them, for snakes to frighten them
out of their boots or gaiters, for country cows to run them out of
pastures, and fleas to get inside their night gowns and practice the
lancers all night. May their food disagree with them, their clothes
fail to come back from the laundry, and their bandoline lose its staying
qualities.
And may those at the house where children are welcome have health and
happiness, and may they get to heaven, eventually, with the children,
and while on the way up there may they throw a bundle of prepared
kindling wood into the pit below where the child haters are sighing for
zinc ulsters.
THE KIND OF A DOCTOR TO HAVE.
A dispatch from Long Branch announces that "Dr. Bliss goes to New York
for a few hours today." That is encouraging. If the doctors had kept
away from the President more he would have been better. He has had from
one to six doctors in sight, night and day, for over ten weeks. Take
a man here at home that is sick, and let a doctor go and stay with him
night and day, and how long do you suppose the man would live?
What a sick man wants is to have a doctor go around practicing on other
people, and come in once or twice a day, blow off a little steam, slap
the patient on the leg and say, "Well, boss, how's your liver?" A sick
man wants to have a
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