.

"You 'ear that?" appealed Chippo to another N.C.O. who was standing by. "He
was allus jealous of me 'avin' a pet, so 'e deliberately set 'is dawg on
it, an' now 'e's gloatin'."

"See 'ere, my lad," spluttered Bulter, "you'll be for orderly-room
to-morrow if you ain't careful."

"Very well, Sergeant," said Chippo meekly; "it'll give me a chawnce to make
my complaint to the orficer."

"'Ow do you mean?"

"Why, against you for flat disobedience of Battalion horders. If you 'adn't
let your dawg run about the lines unattended this wouldn't 'ave 'appened."

The Sergeant's face bore the expression of a quack compelled to swallow his
own pills. Chippo continued relentlessly and untruthfully--

"I 'ear she's bit the Colonel's groom an' pinched the joint from the
Warrant Orficers' Mess. She never oughtn't to be at large, she didn't."

Rarely in his career had Bulter shown such visible discomfiture.

"Of course," added Chippo casually, "if Jane was _my_ dawg I'd 'ave no
grounds for complaint."

When your strong man is compelled to submit to the inevitable he usually
does it ungracefully. Bulter took the collar from Jane's neck and pushed
her over with his foot.

"Take the brute," he said, "an' if ever I see 'er round this Mess again
I'll shoot 'er!"

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Fatuous Person._ "ARE YOU A DIVER?"

_Cynic._ "HO, NO. I'M PAVLOVER'S DANCIN' PARTNER."]

* * * * *

"Paris, Friday.--The High Court of the Senate resumed in public its
hearing of the Caillaux trial.... The jury found the prisoner guilty.
Mr. Justice Darling postponed sentence."--_Scotch Paper._

No other journal appears to have noticed this remarkable extension of the
_Entente Cordiale_.

* * * * *

SUSSEX GODS.

I have been told, and do not doubt,
That Devon lanes are dim with trees,
And shagged with fern, and loved of bees,
And all with roses pranked about;
I do believe that other-where
The woods are green, the meadows fair.

And woods, I know, have always been
The haunt of fairies, good or grim;
There the knight-errant hasted him;
There _Bottom_ found _King Oberon's_ Queen;
The Enchanted Castle _always_ stood
Deep in the shadow of a wood.

But I know upland spirits too
Who love the shadeless downs to climb;
There, in the far-off fabled time,
Men called them when the mo