Head Constable
would soon have another an' maybe a worse man in
my place.

MRS. COTTER
The Lord save us!

SERGEANT
But as herself says: There's no use in the Government
makin' laws if the people don't keep them.

MRS. COTTER
That's so.

SERGEANT
Keepin' the world in order is no aisy business, ma'am.

MRS. COTTER
'Tis a great responsibility.

SERGEANT (_drawing a chair to the fire and sitting down_)
'Pon me word I'm tired an' cold too.

MRS. COTTER
Wouldn't ye go home and go to bed, Sergeant?

SERGEANT
If I went to bed at this hour, the Head would send a
report to his chum the Inspector, statin' that I was
drunk. (_Coughs_)

MRS. COTTER
That's a bad cough. How long is it troublin' ye?

SERGEANT
Only since supper time. I was eatin' a bit o' cold
meat, an' a bone or somethin' stuck there. (_Points at
his throat_)

MRS. COTTER
An' what did ye do for it?

SERGEANT
What could I do for it?

MRS. COTTER
Ye could take a drink o' somethin' an' wash it down.

SERGEANT
I tried some cold tea. (_Coughs_)

MRS. COTTER
I wonder would a bottle of stout do any good.

SERGEANT
'Twould be no harm to try.

MRS. COTTER
Will ye have a bottle?

SERGEANT
To tell ye the truth, I don't like bein' disobligin',
ma'am. (_Coughs_)

[_Exit Mrs. Cotter. While she is away, he walks up
and down, whistling the while_.

MRS. COTTER (_at door_)
Ye might as well come up-stairs, Sergeant. There's a
fine fire in the sitting-room.

SERGEANT
I'm first rate where I am. Thank you all the same.

[_Takes stout and finishes it without withdrawing it from
his mouth. Coughs_.

MRS. COTTER
How do you feel now?

SERGEANT (_wiping his mouth with a large old handkerchief_)
'Tis gone! I mean the bone. I feel meself
again.

MRS. COTTER
I'm glad of that. (_Looking at clock_) 'Tis gone half-past
ten, Sergeant.

SERGEANT
Plenty o' time. We'll be a long time dead, an' happy
I hope.

MRS. COTTER
Amen!

SERGEANT
'Tis my belief that we should all try to do good while
we're alive.

MRS. COTTER
There's a lot o' good people in the world, Sergeant.

SERGEANT
There is, ma'am, but nearly every one o' them thinks
that they're better than what they are. That's what
annoys me.

MRS. COTTER
Sure 'tis imagination that keeps the world movin'.

SERGEANT
Yes, an' ambition. All the same, 'tis a good job that
people can't see themselves as they really are.

MRS. COTTER
They wouldn't believe that they were themselves if