and interesting
particulars of ALFRED's conversations and private life.
_Mary._ How many things ALFRED did! I cannot think how he found time
for them all.
_Mrs. M._ He found time by never wasting it. One-third of his time
he devoted to religious exercises and to study, another third to
sleep and necessary refreshment, and the other to the affairs of his
kingdom. The benefits he bestowed on his country were so great and
various that even to this day we hardly comprehend them fully, and
some ungrateful people refuse to regard them as benefits at all.
_Richard._ How sad! But thanks to you, dear Mamma, we know better.
When Papa comes in to tea I will ask him when he thinks I shall be old
enough to read all the books that have ever been written about KING
ALFRED. I want to know everything about him.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Mother (to curate)._ "AND DO YOU REALLY PRAY FOR YOUR
ENEMIES?"
_Ethel (overhearing)._ "I DO, MUMMY."
_Curate._ "AND WHAT DO YOU SAY IN YOUR PRAYER, MY CHILD?"
_Ethel._ "I PRAY THAT THEY MAY BE BEATEN."]
* * * * *
IL FLAUTO MAGICO.
"The Lord Mayor formally declared the aerodrome opened, and turned
on the flute diverting the waters of the Cardinal Wolsey river
underground."--_Evening News_.
* * * * *
From an interview with Lord ROBERT CECIL, as reported by _The
Manchester Guardian_:--
"It is literally true of the British soldier that he is _tans peur
et tans rapproche_."
This perhaps explains some recent reflections on the linguistic
accomplishments of our Foreign Office.
* * * * *
MARIANA IN WAR-TIME.
This tedious and important War
Has altered much that went before,
But did you hear about the change
At _Mariana's_ Moated Grange?
You all of you will recollect
The gross condition of neglect
In which the place appeared to be,
And _Mariana's_ apathy,
Her idleness, her want of tone,
Her--well, her absence of backbone.
Her relatives, no doubt, had tried
To single out the brighter side,
Had scolded her about the moss
And only made her extra cross.
But when the War had really come
At once the place began to hum,
And _Mariana's_, bless her heart!
She threw herself into the part
Of cooking for the V.A.D.
And wholly lost her lethargy.
She sent her gardeners off pell-mell
(The
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