he buried himself alive in the
tomb of his ancestors and starved to death. We have a family vault in
Highgate Cemetery, of which I possess the key. . . . No, I should be
bored and cold, and the coffins would get on my nerves; and besides,
there is something suggestive of smug villadom in the idea of going to
die at Highgate.

Lola came up as I was scribbling this on my knees in the garden.

"What are you writing there?"

"I am recasting Hamlet's soliloquy," I replied, "and I feel all the
better for it."

"Here is your egg and brandy."

I swallowed it and handed her back the glass.

"I feel all the better for that, too."

As I sat in the shade of the little stone summer-house within the Greek
portico, she lingered in the blazing sunshine, a figure all glorious
health and supple curves, and the stray brown hairs above the brown mass
gleamed with the gold of a Giotto aureole. She stood, a duskily glowing,
radiant emblem of life against the background of spring greenery and
rioting convolvulus. I drew a full breath and looked at her as
if magnetised. I had the very oddest sensation. She seemed, in
Shakespearean phrase, to rain influence upon me. As if she read the
stirrings of my blood, she smiled and said:

"After all, confess, isn't it good to be alive?"

A thrill of physical well-being swept through me. I leaped to my feet.

"You witch!" I cried. "What are you doing to me?"

"I?" She retreated a step, with a laugh.

"Yes, you. You are casting a spell on me, so that I may eat my words."

"I don't know what you are talking about, but you haven't answered my
question. It _is_ good to be alive."

"Well, it is," I assented, losing all sense of consistency.

She flourished the egg-and-brandy glass. "I'm so glad. Now I know you
are really well, and will face life as you faced death, like the brave
man that you are."

I cried to her to hold. I had not intended to go as far as that. I
confronted death with a smile; I meet life with the wriest of wry faces.
She would have none of my arguments.

"No matter how damnable it is--it's splendid to be alive, just to feel
that you can fight, just to feel that you don't care a damn for any old
thing that can happen, because you're strong and brave. I do want you
to get back all that you've lost, all that you've lost through me, and
you'll do it. I know that you'll do it. You'll just go out and smash up
the silly old world and bring it to your feet. You will, Simon, wo