smiled at the airs the little woman gave
herself now that I was no longer the impeccable and irreproachable
dictator of the family. Mine was the experience of every fallen tyrant
since the world began.

"My dear Agatha, I've had enough shocks during the last few weeks to
knock the flippancy out of a Congregational minister. In November I was
condemned to die within six months. The sentence was final and absolute.
I thought I would do the kind of good one can't do with a lifetime in
front of one, and I wasted all my substance in riotous giving. In the
elegant phraseology of high society I am stone-broke. As my training has
not fitted me to earn my living in high-falutin ways, I must earn it in
some humble capacity. Therefore, if you see me call at your house for
the water rate, you'll understand that I am driven to that expedient by
necessity and not by degradation."

Naturally I had to elaborate this succinct statement before my sister
could understand its full significance. Then dismay overwhelmed her.
Surely something could be done. The fortunes of Jane and herself were
at my disposal to set me on my feet again. We were brother and sisters;
what was theirs was mine; they couldn't see me starve. I thanked her for
her affection--the dear creatures would unhesitatingly have let me play
ducks and drakes with their money, but I explained that though poor, I
was still proud and prized the independence of the tax-collector above
the position of the pensioner of Love's bounty.

"Tom must get you something to do," she declared.

"Tom must do nothing of the kind. Let me say that once and for all,"
I returned peremptorily. "I've made my position clear to you,
because you're my sister and you ought to be spared any further
misinterpretation of my actions. But to have you dear people intriguing
after billets for me would be intolerable."

"But what are you going to _do_?" she cried, wringing her hands.

"I'm going for my first omnibus ride to-morrow," said I heroically.

Upon which assertion Rogers entered announcing that her ladyship's
carriage had arrived. A while later I accompanied her downstairs and
along the arcade.

"I shall be so miserable, thinking of you, poor old boy," she said
affectionately, as she bade me good-bye.

"Don't, I am going to enjoy myself for the first time in my life."

These were "prave 'orts," but I felt doleful enough when I re-entered
the chambers where I had lived in uncomplaining luxury