ked me for them an idea that there had been
any diminution in our friendship), yet since Titus Pomponius is starting
for your province, who knows better than anyone else all that I feel and
have done for you, who desires your friendship and is most devotedly
attached to me, I thought I must write something, especially as I had no
other way of satisfying Pomponius himself. Were I to ask from you
services of the greatest moment, it ought not to seem surprising to
anyone: for you have not wanted from me any that concerned your
interests, honour, or position. That no return has been made by you for
these you are the best witness: that something even of a contrary nature
has proceeded from you I have been told by many. I say "told," for I do
not venture to say "discovered,"[72] lest I should chance to use the
word which people tell me is often falsely attributed to me by you. But
the story which has reached my ears I would prefer your learning from
Pomponius (who was equally hurt by it) rather than from my letter. How
singularly loyal my feelings have been to you the senate and Roman
people are both witnesses. How far you have been grateful to me you may
yourself estimate: how much you owe me the rest of the world estimates.
I was induced to do what I did for you at first by affection, and
afterwards by consistency. Your future, believe me, stands in need of
much greater zeal on my part, greater firmness and greater labour.[73]
These labours, unless it shall appear that I am throwing away and
wasting my pains, I shall support with all the strength I have; but if I
see that they are not appreciated, I shall not allow you--the very
person benefited[74]--to think me a fool for my pains. What the meaning
of all this is you will be able to learn from Pomponius. In commending
Pomponius to you, although I am sure you will do anything in your power
for his own sake, yet I do beg that if you have any affection for me
left, you will display it all in Pomponius's business. You can do me no
greater favour than that.

[Footnote 72: The word (_comperisse_) used by Cicero in regard to the
Catilinarian conspiracy; it had apparently become a subject of rather
malignant chaff.]

[Footnote 73: Cicero is hinting at the danger of prosecution hanging
over the head of Antonius.]

[Footnote 74: Reading _tibi ipsi_ (not _ipse_), with Tyrrell.]

XVIII (A 1, 13)

TO ATTICUS (IN EPIRUS)

ROME, 27 JANUARY

[Sidenote: B.C. 61, AET. 45]