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SONG FOR AN EMPEROR AFTER A (FRIENDLY) VISIT TO CANOSSA.--
"Be it ever so humbling, there's no place like Rome!"

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ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

[Illustration: "At the Sign of the 'Budget Shop.'"]

_House of Commons, Monday, April 24._--House nearly Counted Out just
now, although it's Budget Night and usual Resolutions not yet passed.
Catastrophe averted, and sitting continued. CHILDERS come back to old
scene. Looking on from below Gallery, says it's the quietest Budget
Night he remembers. Usually scene one of seething excitement. One or
more Trades expect taxes affecting them will either go up or go
down. Lobby besieged by anxious representatives. Nothing of the sort
to-night. When SQUIRE of MALWOOD rose to expound his mystery, Benches
not fuller than on ordinary night. Of those present there was no
speculation in the eyes they turned upon the CHANCELLOR standing at
table. The SQUIRE, a great Parliamentary artist, attuned voice and
manner to prevailing tone; avoided anything approaching oratorical
style; plain business statement to make; accomplished it in fine
head-clerkly manner.

An unfailing tradition about Budget Speech is that it shall contain
at least one quotation from the Classics. Mr. G. from year to year
observed this custom with splendid effect. LOWE'S _Ex luce lucellum_
is famous in history; nearly became the epitaph of a Ministry;
certainly was the funeral wail over a carefully-constructed Budget.
The SQUIRE to-night felt bound to observe tradition; but in accordance
with his nature did it modestly, adventuring nothing more recondite
than citation of the familiar line that serves to mark WREN'S
resting-place in Westminster Abbey. TOMMY BOWLES took opportunity
of remarking that he was "disappointed with the Budget." This
mental attitude, though not quite unexpected, threw fresh gloom over
proceedings, and talk, reduced to whisper, finally died out.

_Business done._--Budget brought in.

_Tuesday._--The young men behind PRINCE ARTHUR out on the war-path.
"Tell you what," says LEGH of Lyme; "let's have BRYCE's scalp."

"By the Holy Roman Empire, yes!" cried GEORGE CURZON, to whom genial
observation was addressed. "Let's get at him about his snubbing
SEFTON, in matter of appointment of Lancashire County Magistrates.
'Twill serve a double debt to pay. We'll have a lark--'_Quelles
alouettes!_' as it is w