rt, I loathed thee so,
There on show, there on show, Margarina!

I saw thee in a sallow dab, Margarina!
Upon the grubby marble slab, Margarina!
O sickening stodge! O greasy shine!
O "Dairy Produce" miscalled "Fine"!
O haunt of all blue-flies that blow,
There on show, there on show, Margarina!

I fled along that gloomy street, Margarina!
Disgusted, sickened, sad, dead-beat, Margarina!
Yet still I see that dingy slab,
That oleaginous pale, pale dab.
And thou art still on sale I know,
Where soot-flakes all, and blue-flies blow, Margarina!

But every night at my snug tea, Margarina!
Over my toast I muse on thee, Margarina!
I sniff that smell, I see that dab,
That greasy, grimy, marble slab.
And thou art still the same I know,
The slum's strange love, the slum's strange love.
The poor man's "Butter," there on show! Margarina!

* * * * *

MRS. RAM, who had been listening to a conversation among golf-players,
and now flatters herself on knowing something about the game,
observed--"I suppose, in the Season, instead of Five-o'clock Teas, the
fashion at Hurlingham and those places will be to have Golf Teas." She
didn't know that it was spelt 'Tees.'

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M. P.

_House of Commons, Tuesday, Jan. 31st._--Back again in old place, with
SPEAKER in Chair, Mace on table, and Serjeant-at-Arms on guard. Nothing
changed except the Government. Some old familiar faces gone; others
replace them. Same old bustle, hearty greeting, and effusive
hand-shaking.

"There's only one thing," says ERSKINE, of Cardross, "that equals the
hilarity of the opening of a New Session, and that is the joy with which
the boys go off on the day of Prorogation."

ERSKINE been in the Chair by the cross-benches some years now. Naturally
growing philosophical; insensibly cultivates habit of sententious speech.

"Wonder you can be so garrulous, TOBY," he says, "considering the number
of Speeches you hear in a Session. We take in eloquence at the pores, and
I for one have no tendency toward exudation."

"Ah," I said, "perhaps that's the lack of exercise. Dear old GOSSET! he
was better off in that respect. Remember how he used to waltz up and down
between doorway and table with BRADLAUGH? A heavy partner, too,
especially taken after dinner. Bu