elatives,
Thank God we can choose our friends.

"Father."

"Well, what is it?"

"It says here, 'A man is known by the company he keeps.'
Is that so, Father?"

"Yes, yes, yes."

"Well, Father, if a good man keeps company with a bad
man, is the good man bad because he keeps company with the
bad man, and is the bad man good because he keeps company
with the good man?"--_Punch_.

Here's champagne to our real friends.
And real pain to our sham friends.

It's better to make friends fast
Than to make fast friends.

Some friends are a habit--some a luxury.

A friend is one who overlooks your virtues and appreciates your faults.

FRIENDS, SOCIETY OF

A visitor to Philadelphia, unfamiliar with the garb of the Society of
Friends, was much interested in two demure and placid Quakeresses who
took seats directly behind her in the Broad Street Station. After a few
minutes' silence she was somewhat startled to hear a gentle voice
inquire: "Sister Kate, will thee go to the counter and have a milk punch
on me?"--_Carolina Lockhart_.

FRIENDSHIP

Friendly may we part and quickly meet again.

There's fellowship
In every sip
Of friendship's brew.

May we all travel through the world and sow it thick with friendship.

Here's to the four hinges of Friendship--
Swearing, Lying, Stealing and Drinking.
When you swear, swear by your country;
When you lie, lie for a pretty woman,
When you steal, steal away from bad company
And when you drink, drink with me.

The trouble with having friends is the upkeep.

"Brown volunteered to lend me money."

"Did you take it?"

"No. That sort of friendship is too good to lose."

"I let my house furnished, and they've had measles there. Of course
we've had the place disinfected; so I suppose it's quite safe. What do
you think?"

"I fancy it would be all right, dear; but I think, perhaps, it would be
safer to lend it to a friend first."--_Punch_.

"Hoo is it, Jeemes, that you mak' sic an enairmous profit aff yer
potatoes? Yer price is lower than ony ither in the toon and ye mak'
extra reductions for yer freends."

"Weel, ye see, I knock aff twa shillin's a ton beacuse a customer is a
freend o' mine, an' then I jist tak' twa hundert-weight aff the ton
because I'm a freend o' his."--_Punch_.

The conductor of a western freight train saw a tramp stealing a ride on
one of the forward cars. He told the brakem