tively felt that any words of conventional sympathy would
jar here; indeed, the Professor's attitude and expression reminded him
irresistibly of a certain "Blondin Donkey" he had seen enacted by
music-hall artists, at the point where it becomes sullen and defiant.
Only, he had laughed helplessly at the Blondin Donkey, and somehow he
felt no inclination to laugh now.

"Believe me, sir," he began, "I would not disturb you like this
unless--steady there, for Heaven's sake Professor, don't kick till
you've heard me out!" For, the mule, in a clumsy, shambling way which
betrayed the novice, was slowly revolving on his own axis so as to bring
his hind-quarters into action, while still keeping his only serviceable
eye upon his unwelcome visitor.

"Listen to me, sir," said Horace, manoeuvring in his turn. "I'm not to
blame for this, and if you brain me, as you seem to be endeavouring to
do, you'll simply destroy the only living man who can get you out of
this."

The mule appeared impressed by this, and backed cumbrously into a
corner, from which he regarded Horace with a mistrustful, but attentive,
eye. "If, as I imagine, sir," continued Horace, "you are, though
temporarily deprived of speech, perfectly capable of following an
argument, will you kindly signify it by raising your right ear?" The
mule's right ear rose with a sharp twitch.

"Now we can get on," said Horace. "First let me tell you that I
repudiate all responsibility for the proceedings of that infernal
Jinnee.... I wouldn't stamp like that--you might go through the floor,
you know.... Now, if you will only exercise a little patience----"

At this the exasperated animal made a sudden run at him with his mouth
open, which obliged Horace to shelter himself behind a large leather
arm-chair. "You really _must_ keep cool, sir," he remonstrated; "your
nerves are naturally upset. If I might suggest a little champagne--you
could manage it in--in a bucket, and it would help you to pull yourself
together. A whisk of your--er--tail would imply consent." The
Professor's tail instantly swept some rare Arabian glass lamps and vases
from a shelf at his rear, whereupon Mrs. Futvoye went out, and returned
presently with a bottle of champagne and a large china _jardiniere_, as
the best substitute she could find for a bucket.

When the mule had drained the flower-pot greedily and appeared
refreshed, Horace proceeded: "I have every hope, sir," he said, "that
before many hours you