ton Arcade. He
said to her, 'O, you little duck!' She said to him, 'Fowls are cheap
to-day!' The consequences were that they never smiled again, and the
world said, 'What price hot potatoes?'" (_Everybody looks depressed._)
H'm--not bad--but I think we'll play something else now. [_ZEFFIE
perceives that ALGY is not pleased with her._

_Tommy_. (_To Uncle JOSEPH_). Uncle, why didn't _you_ carve at dinner?

_Uncle J._ Well, TOMMY, because the carving was done at a side
table--and uncommon badly done, too. Why do you want to know?

_Tommy_. Parpar thought you _would_ carve, I know. He told Mummy she
must ask you, because--

_Mrs. C._ (_With a prophetic instinct._) Now, TOMMY, you mustn't tease
your Uncle. Come away, and tell your new Aunt ZEFFIE what you're going
to do with your Christmas boxes.

_Tommy_. But mayn't I tell him what Parpar said, first?

_Mrs. C._ No, no; by and by--not now! [_She averts the danger._

[_Later; the Company are playing "Hide the Thimble;" i.e.,
someone has planted that article in a place so conspicuous
that few would expect to find it there. As each person catches
sight of it, he or she sits down. Uncle JOSEPH is still,
to the general merriment, wandering about and getting angrier
every moment._

_Mr. C._ That's it, Uncle, you're _warm_--you're _getting_ warm!

_Uncle J._ (_Boiling over._) _Warm_, Sir? _I am_ warm--and something
more. I can tell you! [_Sits down with a bump._

_Mr. C._ You haven't _seen_ it! I'm sure you haven't seen it. Come
now, Uncle!

_Uncle J._ Never mind whether I have or have not. Perhaps I don't
_want_ to see it, Sir!

_The Children_. Then do you give it up? Do you want to be told? Why,
it's staring you in the face all the time!

_Uncle J._ I don't care whether it's staring or not--I don't want to
be told anything more about it.

_The Children_. Then you're _cheating_, Uncle--you must go on walking
till you _do_ see it!

_Uncle J._ Oh, that's it, eh? Very well, then--I'll walk!

[_Walks out, leaving the company paralysed._

_Mrs. C._ Run after him, TOMMY, and tell him--quick! [_Exit TOMMY._

_Mr. C._ (_feebly_). I think when Uncle JOSEPH does come back, we'd
better try to think of some game he _can't_ lose his temper at. Ah,
here's TOMMY!

_Tommy_. I _told_ him--but he went all the same, and slammed the door.
He said I was to go back and tell you that you would find he _was_ cut
up--and cut up rough, too!

_Mrs. C.