rance to an oath which I shall not repeat) and you too,
sir; you unpudent meddling scoundrel.'

"'Scoundrel, sir!' said I. 'Yes,' replied the irate gentleman, seizing
me rudely by the collar--and he would have choked me, but that my blue
satin stock and false collar gave way, and were left in the hands of
this GENTLEMAN. 'Help, landlord!' I loudly exclaimed, adding, I believe,
'murder,' and other exclamations of alarm. In vain I appealed to
the crowd, which by this time was pretty considerable; they and the
unfeeling post-boys only burst into laughter, and called out, 'Give it
him, Captain.' A struggle ensued, in which I have no doubt I should have
had the better, but that the Captain, joining suddenly in the general
and indecent hilarity, which was doubled when I fell down, stopped and
said, 'Well, Jims, I won't fight on my marriage-day. Go into the tap,
Jims, and order a glass of brandy-and-water at my expense--and mind I
don't see your face to-morrow morning, or I'll make it more ugly than it
is.'

"With these gross expressions and a cheer from the crowd, Mr.
Silvertop entered the inn. I need not say that I did not partake of
his hospitality, and that personally I despise his insults. I make them
known that they may call down the indignation of the body of which I am
a member, and throw myself on the sympathy of the public, as a gentleman
shamefully assaulted and insulted in the discharge of a public duty."

"Thus you've sean how the flower of my affeckshns was tawn out of my
busm, and my art was left bleading. Hangelina! I forgive thee. Mace thou
be appy! If ever artfelt prayer for others wheel awailed on i, the beink
on womb you trampled addresses those subblygations to Evn in your be1/2!

"I went home like a maniack, after hearing the announcement of
Hangelina's departur. She'd been gone twenty hours when I heard the
fatle noose. Purshoot was vain. Suppose I DID kitch her up, they were
married, and what could we do? This sensable remark I made to Earl
Bareacres, when that distragted nobleman igspawstulated with me. Er
who was to have been my mother-in-lor, the Countiss, I never from that
momink sor agin. My presnts, troosoes, juels, &c., were sent back--with
the igsepshn of the diminds and Cashmear shawl, which her Ladyship
COODN'T FIND. Ony it was whispered that at the nex buthday she was seen
with a shawl IGSACKLY OF THE SAME PATTN. Let er keep it.

"Southdown was phurius. He came to me hafter the ewent, a