himself a hurried lick down before he hears the cook's step on the
stairs. When she enters the kitchen he is curled up on the hearthrug,
fast asleep. The opening of the shutters awakes him. He rises and comes
forward, yawning and stretching himself.

"'Dear me, is it morning, then?' he says drowsily. 'Heigh-ho! I've had
such a lovely sleep, cook; and such a beautiful dream about poor mother.'

"Cats! do you call them? Why, they are Christians in everything except
the number of legs."

"They certainly are," I responded, "wonderfully cunning little animals,
and it is not by their moral and religious instincts alone that they are
so closely linked to man; the marvellous ability they display in taking
care of 'number one' is worthy of the human race itself. Some friends of
mine had a cat, a big black Tom: they have got half of him still. They
had reared him from a kitten, and, in their homely, undemonstrative way,
they liked him. There was nothing, however, approaching passion on
either side.

"One day a Chinchilla came to live in the neighbourhood, under the charge
of an elderly spinster, and the two cats met at a garden wall party.

"'What sort of diggings have you got?' asked the Chinchilla.

"'Oh, pretty fair.'

"'Nice people?'

"'Yes, nice enough--as people go.'

"'Pretty willing? Look after you well, and all that sort of thing?'

"'Yes--oh yes. I've no fault to find with them.'

"'What's the victuals like?'

"'Oh, the usual thing, you know, bones and scraps, and a bit of
dog-biscuit now and then for a change.'

"'Bones and dog-biscuits! Do you mean to say you eat bones?'

"'Yes, when I can get 'em. Why, what's wrong about them?'

"'Shade of Egyptian Isis, bones and dog-biscuits! Don't you ever get any
spring chickens, or a sardine, or a lamb cutlet?'

"'Chickens! Sardines! What are you talking about? What are sardines?'

"'What are sardines! Oh, my dear child (the Chinchilla was a lady cat,
and always called gentlemen friends a little older than herself 'dear
child'), these people of yours are treating you just shamefully. Come,
sit down and tell me all about it. What do they give you to sleep on?'

"'The floor.'

"'I thought so; and skim milk and water to drink, I suppose?'

"'It _is_ a bit thin.'

"'I can quite imagine it. You must leave these people, my dear, at
once.'

"'But where am I to go to?'

"'Anywhere.'

"'But who'll take me in?'

"'Anybody, if you go t