m as dull as the tolling in of
the eighth-hour bell, or a neighbour in the country, that pays you an
annual visit. At this present moment, I'm astonished how anybody can be
clever; and your letter in heroic verse seems more amazing to me than if
the King of Britain was to send an express for me, to dance a hornpipe
before him, or the King of Prussia was to declare in a manifesto, that I
was the occasion of the present war. I detest the invention of writing;
and nothing could reconcile me to it, but that I can assure you at this
distance, that I am yours sincerely,

ANDREW ERSKINE.

There's a genteel conclusion for you. When you come to Edinburgh, I'll
settle an unintermitting correspondence with you.

* * * * *

LETTER VI.

Edinburgh, Nov. 17, 1761.

Dear ERSKINE,--Much much concern does it give me, to find that you have
been in such bad spirits as your last most grievously indicates. I
believe we great geniuses are all a little subject to the sorcery of
that whimsical demon the spleen, which indeed we cannot complain of,
considering what power of enchantment we ourselves possess, by the sweet
magic of our flowing numbers. I would recommend to you to read Mr.
Green's[17] excellent poem upon that subject. He will dispel the clouds
and enliven you immediately. Or if that should not do, you may have
recourse to Xenophon's method, which was boiling potatoes, and pelting
the cats with them, an infallible receipt to promote risibility.

[Footnote 17: Matthew Green (1696-1737). Author of "The Spleen."--ED.]

So you too have listened to the report of my marriage, and must forsooth
display a pretty vein of jocularity upon the mournful occasion. Did you
really believe it? If you did, you will never be able to astonish me
with any thing else that is wonderful in your creed, for I shall reckon
your judgment at least three stanzas worse than formerly.

In the name of every thing that is upside down, what could the people
mean by marrying me? If they had boiled me into portable soup, or
hammered me into horse-shoes, I should not have been greatly surprised.
A man who has so deeply pondered on the wonders daily presented to our
view, and who has experienced so many vicissitudes of fortune, as I have
done, can easily make allowance for stranger things than these. But I
own their matrimonial system exceeds my comprehension.

Happy is it for the world that this affair did not take place. An event