on't turn me out! Do you think Lyubim
Tortsov has come to make jokes? Do you think Lyubim Tortsov is drunk? I
have come to you to ask riddles. [_To KORSHUNOV_] Why has an ass long ears?
Now, then, give us an answer?

RAZLYULYAYEV. That's a hard one!

KORSHUNOV. How do I know?

LYUBIM KARPYCH. So that all may know that he is an ass. [_To his brother_]
Here's a riddle for you! To whom are you marrying your daughter?

GORDEY KARPYCH. That's not your affair! You've no business to ask me.

LYUBIM KARPYCH. And here's another question for you. Are you an honest
merchant, or not? If you are honest, don't associate with a dishonest one.
You can't touch soot and not be defiled.

KORSHUNOV. Joke away--but don't forget yourself, my dear fellow! Turn him
out, or make him keep quiet.

LYUBIM KARPYCH. That meant you! One can see you are as clean as a
chimney-sweep!

GORDEY KARPYCH. Brother, go away quietly, or it will be the worse for you.

LYUBOV GORDEYEVNA. [_Starting up in a fright_] Uncle, stop!

LYUBIM KARPYCH. I won't be quiet! Now blood has begun to talk! _All the
domestics and guests enter._

SCENE XII

_The same with PELAGEYA EGOROVNA, ANNA IVANOVNA, GUSLIN, guests, and
servants._

LYUBIM KARPYCH. Listen, good people! They are insulting Lyubim Tortsov,
they are driving him away. But am I not a guest too? Why should they drive
me away? My clothes are not clean, but I have a clean conscience! I'm not
Korshunov; I didn't rob the poor, I didn't ruin another's life, I didn't
torment my wife with jealousy. Me they drive away, but he's their most
esteemed guest, and he's put in the place of honor. Well, never mind!
They'll give him another wife. My brother is marrying his daughter to him!
Ha, ha, ha! [_Laughs tragically_]

KORSHUNOV. [_Jumps up_] Don't believe him; he lies! He says this out of
spite to me. He's drunk!

LYUBIM KARPYCH. How out of spite? I pardoned you long ago. I'm a man of
small account, a crawling worm, the lowest of the low! But don't you do
evil to others.

GORDEY KARPYCH. [_To the servants_] Take him away!

LYUBIM KARPYCH. [_Holding up one finger_] Sh, don't touch me! It's an easy
life in this world for a man whose eyes are shameless! Oh, men, men! Lyubim
Tortsov is a drunkard, but he's better than you! Here, now, I'll go away of
my own accord. [_Turning to the crowd_] Make way--Lyubim Tortsov is going!
[_Goes, and suddenly turns round_] Unnatural monster! [_Goes out_]

KORSHUNOV