haracter, enter with a small dog, pet falcon,
mongoose, tame bear or whatever animal is most in keeping with the part,
and confide in this animal such sorrows, hopes or secret history as the
audience has got to know. This has the additional advantage of putting
the audience immediately in sympathy with your hero. "How _sweet_ of
him," all the ladies say, "to tell his little bantam about it!"

If you are not yet tired (as I am) of the Prince of Denmark, I will
explain (for the last time) how a modern author might re-write his
speech.

_Enter_ Hamlet _with his favourite_ boar-hound.

_Ham. (to B.-H.)_. To be or not to be--ah, Fido, Fido! That is the
question--eh, old Fido, boy? Whether 'tis nobler in--how now, a rat!
Rats, Fido, _fetch_ 'em--in the mind to suffer the slings and--_down_,
Sir!--arrows--put it down! Arrows of--_drop_ it, Fido; good old dog--

And so on. Which strikes me as rather sweet and natural.

Let us now pass on to the very important question of

EXITS AND ENTRANCES

To the young playwright, the difficulty of getting his characters on to
the stage would seem much less than the difficulty of finding them
something to say when they are there. He writes gaily and without
hesitation "_Enter_ Lord Arthur Fluffinose," and only then begins to bite
the end of his penholder and gaze round his library for inspiration. Yet
it is on that one word "Enter" that his reputation for dramatic technique
will hang. Why did Lord Arthur Fluffinose enter? The obvious answer, that
the firm which is mentioned in the programme as supplying his trousers
would be annoyed if he didn't, is not enough; nor is it enough to say
that the whole plot of the piece hinges on him, and that without him the
drama would languish. What the critic wants to know is why Lord Arthur
chose that very moment to come in--the very moment when Lady Larkspur was
left alone in the oak-beamed hall of Larkspur Towers. Was it only a
coincidence? And if the young dramatist answers callously, "Yes," it
simply shows that he has no feeling for the stage whatever. In that case
I needn't go on with this article.

However, it will be more convenient to assume, dear reader, that in your
play Lord Arthur had a good reason for coming in. If that be so, he must
explain it. It won't do to write like this:---

_Enter_ Lord Arthur. Lady Larkspur _starts suddenly and turns towards
him._

_Lady Larkspur_. Arthur! _You_ here? (_He gives a nod of confirmation.
Sh