mportant a subject without consulting her
friends, to whom she accordingly refers him. It would then become her
duty to intimate to him that, although his attentions are agreeable to
them, he must wait a while, till, from further acquaintance, they are
enabled to judge whether it will conduce to the mutual happiness of
their daughter and himself for her to accept the offer he has so
kindly made.

But it is not only young men who

ARE APT TO BE HASTY

in these matters. It is, as is well known, not uncommon for parents,
especially mothers, very soon after a young man has begun to pay
attention to their daughter, to give him to understand that they wish
to know his intentions in reference to her. By such proceedings a
young man may be taken aback, and either hurry into a match, which
turns out unhappily, or be led to withdraw from a union which might
have resulted in the happiness of all the parties concerned.

That your parents should wish you to be married is only natural,
especially if their own marriage has been a happy one. It will be
gratifying to them to see a worthy young man paying attention to you,
and most probably they will let things take their own course. Marriage
is too important a matter to admit of being hastened.

There are, I am aware, unwise parents, who, from various motives, will
throw obstacles in the way of young people who are desirous of coming
together. Some are so selfish as to be unwilling to part with their
daughter, preferring their own happiness to hers. Others are so silly
as to think no ordinary man good enough for her, and therefore, if
they had their own way, would have her to become an old maid.
Fortunately, such shortsighted people are not infrequently outwitted.

If your parents are, as I hope they are, reasonable in their views and
expectations, one of the chief concerns of their life will be the
promotion of your happiness, and it behooves you to pay the utmost
deference to their opinion; and should they, from circumstances they
become aware of, deem it advisable that you should either postpone or
even break off an engagement, they will doubtless give you such
weighty reasons as will justify you in acting on their advice. Where,
however, as sometimes happens, they unwisely refuse their consent to
their child's marriage at a time when she well knows from her own
feelings, and also from the sanction she receives from the opinion of
trustworthy and ju