which seems native
to the tribe of waiters. A slight dash of surprise is in this
professional manner; and there is a faint smile on the solemn,
professional countenance, which is perhaps prompted by too intimate
knowledge of the mysteries of the kitchen and the habits of the cook.
The man who passes his life among beefsteaks cannot be expected to
love them, or to regard without wonder the avidity with which others
devour them. I imagine that service in restaurants must beget simple
and natural tastes in eating, and that the jaded men who minister
there to our pampered appetites demand only for themselves--

"A scrip with herbs and fruits supplied,
And water from the spring."

Turning from this thought to the purchase of my hat, I do not believe
that literary art can interest the reader in that purely personal
transaction, though I have no doubt that a great deal might be said
about buying hats as a principle. I prefer, therefore, to pass to our
search for the Consul.

A former Consul at ----, whom I know, has told me a good many stories
about the pieces of popular mind which he received at different times
from the travelling public, in reproof of his difficulty of discovery;
and I think it must be one of the most jealously guarded rights
of American citizens in foreign lands to declare the national
representative hard to find, if there is no other complaint to
lodge against him. It seems to be, in peculiar degree, a quality of
consulship at ----, to be found remote and inaccessible. My friend
says that even at New York, before setting out for his post, when
inquiring into the history of his predecessors, he heard that they
were one and all hard to find; and he relates that on the steamer,
going over, there was a low fellow who set the table in a roar by a
vulgar anecdote to this effect:--

"There was once a consul at ----, who indicated his office-hours by
the legend on his door, 'In from ten to one.' An old ship-captain,
who kept coming for about a week without finding the Consul, at last
furiously wrote, in the terms of wager, under this legend, 'Ten to one
you're out!'"

My friend also states that one day a visitor of his remarked: "I'm
rather surprised to find you in. As a general rule, I never do find
consuls in." Habitually, his fellow-countrymen entertained him with
accounts of their misadventures in reaching him. It was useless to
represent to them that his house was in the most convenient locality