e. In the sweetness of
my present peace, such days seem to me made to tell man the
worst of his lot; but still that November wind can bring a
chill of memory.

'I paused beside a little stream, which I had envied in the
merry fulness of its spring life. It was shrunken, voiceless,
choked with withered leaves. I marvelled that it did not quite
lose itself in the earth. There was no stay for me, and I went
on and on, till I came to where the trees were thick about
a little pool, dark and silent. I sat down there. I did not
think; all was dark, and cold, and still. Suddenly the sun
shone out with that transparent sweetness, like the last smile
of a dying lover, which it will use when it has been unkind
all a cold autumn day. And, even then, passed into my thought
a beam from its true sun, from its native sphere, which has
never since departed from me. I remembered how, a little
child. I had stopped myself one day on the stairs, and asked,
how came I here? How is it that I seem to be this Margaret
Fuller? What does it mean? What shall I do about it? I
remembered all the times and ways in which the same thought
had returned. I saw how long it must be before the soul can
learn to act under these limitations of time and space, and
human nature; but I saw, also, that it MUST do it,--that
it must make all this false true,--and sow new and immortal
plants in the garden of God, before it could return again. I
saw there was no self; that selfishness was all folly, and
the result of circumstance; that it was only because I thought
self real that I suffered; that I had only to live in the idea
of the ALL, and all was mine. This truth came to me, and I
received it unhesitatingly; so that I was for that hour taken
up into God. In that true ray most of the relations of earth
seemed mere films, phenomena. * *

'My earthly pain at not being recognized never went deep after
this hour. I had passed the extreme of passionate sorrow; and
all check, all failure, all ignorance, have seemed temporary
ever since. When I consider that this will be nine years ago
next November, I am astonished that I have not gone on faster
since; that I am not yet sufficiently purified to be taken
back to God. Still, I did but touch then on the only haven
of Insight. You know what I would say. I was dwellin