be made
a bankrupt.

* * *

In connection with the "Kensington Camp Week," when an effort is to be
made to raise sufficient funds to establish and equip headquarters for
the Kensington Reservists, a full-sized elephant has been chartered to
ramble about the principal thoroughfares and collect money for the
cause. To ensure success the sagacious quadruped is to be trained to
step accidentally on the toes of those persons who ignore its appeal.

* * *

A correspondent writes to _The Observer_ complaining bitterly of the
state of the morass leading to the Aerodrome at Hendon. This gentleman
does not realise that there is a didactic purpose in the cause of his
annoyance. Learn to fly and you will keep your boots clean.

* * *

[Illustration: _Nut (in car)._ "WHAT'S THAT, KID? 'WHY DON'T I KEEP ON
THE ROAD?' WELL, THE SWEEP MUST BE DEAF--THE BALLY HOOTAH DON'T SHIFT
HIM, AND--WELL, MY DEAR GIRL, THE CAR WAS CLEANED THIS MORNING!"]

* * *

A man has been sentenced at Barmen, Prussia, on three separate counts to
terms of imprisonment totalling 175 years. It is proposed that all the
proprietors of specifics for prolonging life shall be given a free hand
to enable the prisoner to cope with his sentence.

* * *

All German actresses, whether married or single, are, in accordance with
the ruling of the German Theatrical Union of Berlin, to be styled
henceforth "Frau Schauspielerin," _i.e._ "Mrs. Actress." We are
confident that this does not mean that those who are not married ought
to be.

* * *

An advertisement from _The Times_:--"BIG GAME EXPEDITION. Private and
public shooting. Polar bears, musk oxen, walrus and seals arranged."
This is not so easy as it sounds, for, ten to one, as soon as you have
got the beasts arranged one of those plaguey musk oxen will spoil the
whole thing by moving out of its place.

* * *

A remarkable story is being told of the sagacity of a horse belonging to
Captain WATSON, of Ardow, Mull. It lost a shoe, and, managing to get out
of the field where it was grazing, travelled a considerable distance to
a blacksmith, who was astonished to find the horse standing in front of
the door holding up a fore-leg. The horse was shod, and then--we are
afraid the rest of the story makes ugly reading--coolly galloped off
without paying.

* * * * *

"After the annexation of Alsace by Germany the baron stayed